Inbox:
Samir Nasri from Marseille = Reassuringly expensive.
Miguel Veloso from Sporting Lisbon = This boy just wants some Premiership action i.e. wages – but feisty and Flaminiesque!
Alberto Aquilani from Roma = His scumbag agent is just trying his luck.
Sebastian Frey from Fiorentina = Well, we need a goal keeper and this is the only one on the radar so far.
Yaya Toure from Barcelona = Fan speculation – on our wish list so why not sell some papers off the back of it?
Roque Santa Cruz from Blackburn = Yeah… only if Ade goes (see below)... and even then – I doubt it.
Hatem Ben Arfa from Lyon = Apparently this is likely, although it’s all gone quiet over there regarding agreeing a fee.
Lilian Thuram from Barcalona = At 36, you’re having a laugh... unless it’s in the run up for a coaching position?
Mauro Zárate from Al-Sadd (On loan to Birmingham) = Overpriced and I doubt that we’ll start taking players on-loan.
David Villa from Valencia = Team speculation (Top of Fabregas' wish list but if he’s coming to the EPL then Abramovich outbid us to the tune of 25 million)
Outbox:
Kolo Toure = Media speculation in order to destabilise the team relationship with Gallas... again!
Emmanuel Adebayor = The Daily Hate Mail stirring it up.
Alexander Hleb = Agent taking the piss – but show us the money... and we’ll consider it.
Matthieu Flamini = Champions League, you’re having a laugh! Have fun being second fiddle to Gattusso and playing FC Shitskivich in the UEFA cup… mug!
Returns:
Carlos Vela = So long Osasuna and thanks for all the fish! Will the wonder boy deliver? Will he get his visa?! Watch out for this lad- he's going to shine.
We should also consider who is going to be stepping up from the reserves next season... it is fair to say that the youth system is maturing now and producing the goods – will we see a select few get their chance to shine in the League and FA Cup? I certainly hope so.
While we are on the subject of rumours The Joker emailed me again with this rather depressing summation of the recent goings on behind closed doors:
“Hi DogFace, With Hill Wood's change of position, it looks set to us to be a straight fight for control between Kroenke and Usmanov. Although the former is marginally preferable from your point of view, both represent selling out to the gambling markets. Good news? Depends on your perspective - it will mean you will be allowed a shot of the title.”
He’s usually right but I hold out hope of the board being able to keep a leash on this hyena. I for one will be livid if he comes into the board room playing the ‘saviour’ and spending money we don’t have i.e. borrowing the funds from one of his mates in the lodge, spending it on overpriced brats and securing the loan on the club as an asset – look at Man-U, 764 million quid in debt and still spending!! I’m quite sure that SAF doesn’t give a fuck as he’s set to retire with a fat cheque and a bronze bust in honour of his ‘genius’ before the bailiffs kick the doors down and raid the stolen goods in the trophy cabinet. Manure fans would have you believe that this spending is some form of ‘generosity’ from Malcom Glazier... no – this is DEBT and a dirty great big global recession is peeking its head just around the corner.
Check out the economics - the cost of living is going up, inflation is going up (therefore interest rates can’t be held down) the twittering, prawn sandwich munching, middle classes who took out the stupid self assessment mortgages on their stupid fucking houses in an attempt to outdo each other are reaping it big time and are going under left right and centre – and remind me... who is it that buys all your season tickets these days?
Warning – your club could be at risk if you fail to keep up repayments on a loan secured against it.
[20/05/2008 10:45:13] DogFace says: Hmmm... http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/7409979.stm
[20/05/2008 10:45:34] DogFace says: Randomising factor #1 in place ;-)
[20/05/2008 10:45:44] dhjackal says: should suit our long ball game then
[20/05/2008 10:45:58] DogFace says: And the 'hoof it at Drogba' game.
[20/05/2008 10:46:08] dhjackal says: yeah
[20/05/2008 10:46:16] dhjackal says: after all we don't play footaball
[20/05/2008 10:46:25] dhjackal says: and only won the league by luck
[20/05/2008 10:46:28] DogFace says: You play better football than chelsea
[20/05/2008 10:46:35] dhjackal says: thanks
[20/05/2008 10:46:39] DogFace says: And it wasn't luck - you cheated!
[20/05/2008 10:46:43] DogFace says: :-D
[20/05/2008 10:46:47] dhjackal says: we won!
[20/05/2008 10:48:11] DogFace says: Ooh - listen to the interview... you boys have got the 'winning dressing room' over 90% of the teams who have that dressing room win... apparently.
[20/05/2008 10:48:26] dhjackal says: that's it then
[20/05/2008 10:48:36] dhjackal says: might as well fuel up the bus
[20/05/2008 10:48:50] DogFace says: My cash is big on Man-u!
[20/05/2008 10:49:12] DogFace says: Or Chelsea... hmmm.
[20/05/2008 10:49:45] DogFace says: Right - OK, shit pitch which means low scoring game - draw in 90 minutes and Man-u to nick it in extra time.
[20/05/2008 10:50:20] DogFace says: HT/FT Manu/Draw – the Chavs to equalise with a dodgy decision.
[20/05/2008 10:50:52] DogFace says: You will have the better fitness though - so if it goes past 90 minutes they'll start cramping up.
[20/05/2008 10:51:41] DogFace says: The chavs will probably want to take it to penalties though - so might be a dull game.
[20/05/2008 10:52:15] dhjackal says: i guess we'll find out tomorrow
[20/05/2008 10:52:27] DogFace says: Yeah man - you got any cash on it?
[20/05/2008 10:52:36] dhjackal says: no
[20/05/2008 10:52:38] DogFace says: What's your read of the game?
[20/05/2008 10:52:46] dhjackal says: we're going to win
[20/05/2008 10:52:50] DogFace says: How?
[20/05/2008 10:52:54] dhjackal says: don't care
[20/05/2008 10:52:57] DogFace says: Ha – fair enough.
[20/05/2008 10:54:26] DogFace says: If it goes to penalties and Ronaldo chokes I hope you don't mind if I take the piss the next day?
[20/05/2008 11:41:30] DogFace says: Good job you're not going – check it out: "Anyone planning on excessive drinking in Moscow, though, has been warned against it.
The city has special 'drink police' who travel around with mobile cells, looking for drunks, and if those cells are full, offenders risk being taken to 'sobering houses'."
[20/05/2008 11:42:43] dhjackal says: what a load of shit
[20/05/2008 11:43:00] DogFace says: You'd be banged up in a mobile cell!
[20/05/2008 11:43:14] dhjackal says: probably
[20/05/2008 11:43:20] DogFace says: or taken to a sobering house - WTF is a sobering house?
[20/05/2008 11:43:21] dhjackal says: they have those in Oz
[20/05/2008 11:43:35] DogFace says: Really? Blimey!
[20/05/2008 11:44:15] DogFace says: Check it out: "Slovakian Lubos Michel will referee the match - the man who officiated the Champions League semi-final between Chelsea and Liverpool in 2005, when Luis Garcia was controversially award the goal that saw the Reds to the final."
[20/05/2008 11:45:14] DogFace says: The ref has form... one wonders who the highest bidder was?
[20/05/2008 11:45:17] DogFace says: (rofl)
[20/05/2008 11:45:17] DogFace says: Hey – wasn’t that the boy who fucked Ghana against Brazil in the 2006 World Cup?
[20/05/2008 11:45:34] dhjackal says: (finger)
