Now... when a topic gets onto The Sun discussion board: "Do you reckon the Arsenal v Hull game last night was fixed?" you have to ask yourself... are people starting to twig?
OF COURSE IT WAS FIXED!
But that's just my humble opinion... this was an interesting game with a dynamic that I managed to predict in the pub pre-match when I found out that it was Riley as the ref and Dean as the fourth official - let me explain.
There was only going to be one winner of this match and that was Arsenal - this is not just that we are a better team than Hull, as that matters not with officials like these - it was because Hull v Chelsea at Wembley for the semi final is a nailed on bore-fest Chav win... this would be bad for the bookies and this would be bad for Setanta... and the FA. Where as a Arsenal v Chelsea at Wembley would basically be a licence to print money... it would still be a nailed on Chav win as I can't see us getting a fair match but for your average punter this is much more spectacular event... which would be made even more attractive if, perhaps, Chelsea underperformed in the league in the run up?
Let's see what the aforementioned Dean gives them tomorrow against Tottenham... will he send off Drogba? It's almost worth a flutter.
Aside aside - that's not the whole story - the mug money for the Arsenal v Hull game was on Arsenal/Arsenal HT/FT as Arsenal (to win) was only offering 1.34 odds wise (on which I lumped on). The HT/FT bet was offering close to 2.0 pre-match which was far more attractive to both the greedy bettor and the greedier bookie. I said to Decker and PieFace on the walk up to the stadium that Riley would hold us back first half and let us go in the second... again - the choice of Riley/Dean was interesting as it would have also thrown off the pro-punter as they (Dean and Riley) are, in a lot of pro-punters opinion, Arsenal hating cunts - but, to me, the magic of the cup dictated the result of this match a long time ago.
So... let us put ourselves in the mind-set of a certain cretin Mr. Phil Brown, manager of Hull.
During the first half as Dean was sat down and chatting to the Hull assistant manager and not even watching the action Phil was grinning from ear to ear as Riley gave Hull everything... they could cheat at will and poor Phil was lulled into the premature conclusion that it was 'in the stars' that he would be taking the mighty Tigers to Wembley... perhaps even for the final! Visions of Hull winning the FA cup flashed through his mind with him being lifted aloft in slow motion by a bunch of burly bricklayers in stripey shirts thrusting the worthless piece of tin skywards.
Watch the replays of the first half - his eyes are misty and moist at what he is seeing.
The words to Ottawan's D.I.S.C.O were dancing, contextually modified, across his subconscious in a joyous Yorkshire brogue as foul after foul went in in what was basically a replay of Brown's 'genius' tactics in his first visit to the Emirates... nothing like a 'fair game' eh Phil?
Who would blame him for thinking, as the half time whistle blew that this one was 'in the bag'...
...but not just him - all over the country the in-play betting market was hotting up.
The genius, Phil Brown, in his half time talk obviously failed to spot the inevitability of the situation he would be leading his team into in the second half - an inevitability that, incidentally, a bunch of beered up cynical geezers in the Herbert Chapman sussed out about 1 hour previously. 'It's in the bag lads - more of the same, get stuck into them' - was obviously among the pearls of wisdom dispensed.
In the second half Dean stopped socialising and paid far more attention to the game... Riley seemed to have found his contact lenses at half time too and popped them in with miraculous effect.
When forced to actually play football Hull are shown up for exactly what they are... i.e. shit.
I lost count of the number of yellows that were dished out - it was clear that Riley was looking to send one of them off and Phil, god bless him, made a few tactical substitutions - Riley also flipped out a few random yellow cards for the Arsenal players too, y'kow - just to keep up appearances.
The Gallas goal was offside to me - but fuck it, if we'd have had a fair game for 90 minutes it would have been 4-0... I know Wenger claims that the goalie got a fist to it but - nah, offside as anything.
It was at this point that the media-savy genius permatan sharp-suited tiger tie celebrity Phil Brown's dreams evaporated and he made possibly the most massive fuckup of his managerial career and in the post match interview 'tittle tattled' to the media his grievances regarding Arsene Wenger and Cesc Fabregas. Let's ignore the fact that half of what he said was immediately proven to be a bare faced lie and the other half totally unprovable and instead try to fathom the man's motivations in doing this? In the second interview he gave to a radio station he maintains his stance as his voice literally breaks under the stress at realisation of the enormity of the fuckup he is making. How can I possibly be angry with him... he's basically just cut off his cock to spite his balls. Politically this is going to reflect very badly... a manager who cannot be trusted keep his mouth firmly shut about some of the unsavoury realities of the game is not welcome in the EPL. Think Keane, think Scolari... think Brown.
A smug Hull spokesman said yesterday that he was proud that the FA were investigating this (like they were taking it seriously) - today the FA issue Phil with a fine for being a twat in a previous game... the writing is on the wall mate - Arsenal may have fallen out of favour with the game of late but we are still a big pull - Hull, on the other hand, are on a par with pond life with a liability for a manager.
Still, if all else fails, the 'cringing embarassment' Phil Brown might get a gig on 'A Question of Sport' as a captain... and he can while away his permatan sharp-suited tiger-tie days wondering where it all went wrong and flirting with that bint who used to play tennis... if would be fitting.
Hull relegated... well - I wouldn't bet against it now.
Onto the CL draw... what can I say other that Result! Given that all draws are fixed this bodes well for our chances... although there is now the possibility of a Liverpool v Arsenal final... hmm.
