Well... I suppose that I should at least try and write a few things while I'm waiting for the Fonz to duly strap on his water-skis and prepare for this seasons grand finale of EPL-Enders.
Happy days!
I'm going to start by slagging of TalkSport - what a pile of shite... I have been refurbishing my flat and I, bored with painting, decided to find some company in a portable radio - y'know, like a proper prole. I tell you what the torrent of shite that that station puts out is beyond my comprehension - is it a comedy? Is it Parody? Surely... it can't be serious!?
Yesterdays discussions revolved around horse racing tips and a debate on 'how dare those dirty towel heads diss our brave lads'. Then Wrighty came on with this horrible fucking sidekick and talked even more shit... there was a 'what's your favourite computer font' phone in!? Today the action revolved around the Arsenal fans in Rome getting a pasting on the bus... and more horse racing tips - the morning session was all about the dirty I-ties; where as the afternoon session discussed how shit Arsenal were and whether the Arsenal fans were asking for it (a stabbing) - the phone in was 'now you know the facts, are Arsenal fans cunts?' - the justification for this was based on an Italian policeman falling over as an Arsenal fan escaped arrest and subsequent beating in the back of the van... there were no callers unsurprisingly and they moved on to Sepp Blatter and how dare he dictate to us how to play football!
This debate was revealing... particularly with the ambitious sidekick to Wrighty carefully dictating the script in his cockney-wanker 'bloke down the pub' manner. Apparently Sepp has dismissed goal line technology as he wants people to play football - not machines - or something. This was carefully whipped into a Sun meets Daily Mail outrage and spun in a rumplestiltskinesque manner into a debate on how it would be OK if we had an extra helper for the ref on the goal line to keep an eye on the ball rather than a pesky machine - it's poor circuits couldn't keep up with a fast moving ball, apparently, and this was backed up by an email from 'Steve' who reckoned that it wouldn't work. And a few more emails from stooges claiming that a bit of controversy made football interesting and we would have nothing to talk about if the correct refereeing decisions were made all the time. Wrighty just nodded along like a Muppet.
This, of course, is utter fucking bollocks... an extra man to check the goal line and help with penalty decisions simply adds another opportunity for corruption i.e. you can't give an apple mac a backhander and ask it to look the other way in the same way that you can't take a PS3 out, get him laid and then threaten to tell his missus if he didn't make the 'right' decisions in a specified match.
But lets skip back the record to the Roma vs Arsenal game... I'm not sure about you but I suspected foul play (actually it was pretty blatant). The Ref was alright... but Roma... tell me this - how can a team with an average age in it's thirties and carrying several injuries play football for two hours straight and then suddenly start bouncing around like spring lambs? Totti - the cunt - played extra time whilst chewing fucking gum!! ColonelDecker reckons that after 90 minutes the camera panned to the Roma team and the phisio was handing out bottles that they just downed before pulling a face and gurning before the camera flicked away again. When it came to the end of extra time the Arsenal team (with an average age in its early twenties) where on their backs panting and cramping up while the Roma lot were all grinding their teeth and jigging about to an imaginary Kylie tune.
Still justice was done and what an experience for the team to get through... Roma - you tried your best, then cheated and still failed - fuck you.
I couldn't watch the penalties - I just downed my pint and left the Chapman, came home and watched the text stream from the BBC Sport site whist eating a toasted cheese and white onion sandwich... sad - it would have been nice to be in the pub with the fans when Tonetto skied it. Not watching penalties now is officially 'lucky'.
I wouldn't have liked to have been one of the Roma team this morning... waking up in a puddle of cold sweat, paranoid with a minging head and a cock that had shrunk to the size of an acorn... it serves them right.
Fucking losers.
I'm going to skip back now a bit further to the first leg when Roma came to the Emirates. TalkSport were banging on about how Arsenal fans should have known better than to go down the wrong street and meet the Ultras, etc. and generally apologising for hooliganism and encouraging fans of all teams to beat the shit out of any away fan that may inadvertently stray into their local on match day. And this got me thinking - in the first leg the Ultras came to Holloway - they pretty much had the streets pre-match and I could clearly hear their chants in the roads all around my house for hours before kick-off. They were roaming in packs looking for the Arsenal firm with a stripe painted over their eyes and scarves round their faces - very organised. Post match I considered just sprinting home as I knew that there would be trouble... I'm not a coward but those boys don't fuck about - they are stabby and fight like a military campaign. In the end I ended up down the Herbert Chapman with the boys to discuss how shit Roma were and how we should have got 5 passed them.
Then the shit hit the fucking fan.
There was a noise outside and there were running battles up and down the Holloway road between the Arsenal hooligans and the Ultras... there were probably over 100 people involved in this - ColonelDecker's younger brother went out with KeepTheFaith for a look - I stayed back and made escape plans with the Decker in case it all went wrong. Chairs, bottles and bricks flew past the window and, when they ran out of those, the Ultras turned to my local Turkish green grocer for some slightly less effective missiles.
The Decker's younger brother came running in panting: "It's mental out there the bloke next to me just got hit with a fuckin' pineapple!! He went down with all pineapple marks on his face!"
KeepTheFaith produced a white onion and proudly placed it on the pool table... I don't know if it hit him or he caught it.
We decided to really make some quite serious plans... these involved sticking a quid in the pool table and getting the balls out, retiring to the disabled bogs (our appointed "helms deep") and bracing the door while we made 'scum' style I'm-the-daddy sock'n'pool ball head smackers as a last line of defence.
The Ultras then smashed up the McDonald's... which I quite admired them for - if only for a millisecond... then we realised that they only did it to get the metal pavement furniture to use as shields in an operation to storm the Chapman. Luckily for us it was that flimsy aluminium stuff and just bounced and buckled off the windows - but they had made the ground and set about trying to boot the door in... scary shit. The enormous Polish bouncers on the door did well and gathered everyone in and got the whole thing bolted up as they arrived - we then sat tight and waited for the cavalry to come...
...You would think that at this point the Metropolitan Police would make some sort of an appearance?
Nope... they shat it and, i'm informed, decided to wait around the corner until the SPG turned up 15 fucking minutes later!
The cavalry, when it did come, was in the form of the Arsenal firm who re-took the Chapman in a running battle that could either be described as brave, insane or a fucking good night out - depending on your perspective... actually the Arsenal boys were about as scary as the Ultras - massive fuckers and all of them completely twunted on cocaine. They came in bleeding with broken hands and faces, eyes rolling around their heads carrying a fallen comrade. One of them shouted 'Clean up' and those who required 'cleaning up' dragged the fallen comrade to the bogs. We felt no safer in their presence... there is something in the eyes of fighting men, a mixture of adrenaline, fear and testosterone (and class A's) that just exudes a choking and oppressive air of violence to all those around who had the temerity to be absent from the front line. We listened in as they talked of the battle - it was a hard one for the home team and there had been some stabbings by the sound of it.
Ten minutes later they came out of the bogs - cleaned up of blood, clothes straightened and pressing wads of scarlet bog-roll to their wounds. KeepTheFaith peeked in after they came out and saw over 20 discarded cocaine wraps on the floor... the mobile phones then came out and with much chatter the battle lines were re-drawn. They left as quickly as they came... Ultras too - just before the police turned up.
Why do I pay my taxes again?
Some plain clothes boys then strolled in and took the CCTV film and left - all was quiet... I took the onion home - but not before stopping by the grocers to buy some bits and pieces, some cheese and a couple of cans of red stripe to see me to bed.
None of this was reported... anywhere - but it happened right here in England and in a local Home Fans pub - so TalkSport, get your fucking facts straight and talk about sport for a change eh... otherwise why not just change the name to TalkShit!?
Showing posts with label Champions League. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Champions League. Show all posts
Thursday, 12 March 2009
Thursday, 6 November 2008
Half man half machine, what does it mean, what does it mean?
It was quite a good game last night – ok, we didn’t smash Fenerbahce – but it was nice to see a competitive match... well – 70 minutes of competition before the team ran out of puff and settled on a point (much to Wenger’s disapproval). They had a charmed goal last night and I have to say that they defended well and their keeper had a great game. Robin van Persie had a great game too... although he didn’t score – he did everything but.
Although, in the last 20 minutes I felt the game was smothered by the ref somewhat and we missed out on a couple of goal scoring opportunities because of it, would it have made a difference?
Probably not.
I opted for club level in the end as the view is better and the beer available and free. Tamzin Outhwaite sat behind me with Tom Ellis (I think), they have been at every game that I’ve sat up there (and there have been some obscure ones) - they are among the few that make any noise, so I guess that they are ok for *celebrities*. Oh - It was her birthday apparently. Another ‘face’ that is always there is Dara O'Briain – you should see him inhale a pie at half time – 3 bites and the fecker is gone... being Irish - I wonder why he supports Arsenal? I'm not saying that there are no Irish gooners - but its rare (we have more Malaysian and Nigerian gooners than Scottish or Irish) as the is no sectarian history with the club... perhaps that, in itself, is reason enough - or maybe it's just his local team.
*UPDATE*
In a pub conversation; dhjackal (resident Irishman) informs me that 'there are loads' of Irish gooners due to the days of Brady, O'Leary and Stapleton... but 'any fecker wid any sense followed United'.
*END UPDATE*
While I was watching last night; I kept thinking that Roberto Carlos looked fat and past it... I checked his stats in the programme and found out he was actually 1 day younger than me – man; that hurt!
The only negatives last night I could find were that Bendtner and Nasri were having very bad games – it looked like they were stoned half the time or had been out on a massive bender the night before – I don’t think they have got any excuses for not being sharp especially considering the game we have on Saturday.
So all in all last night was frustrating and ultimately a little disappointing but for a laugh click here:
http://shop.tottenhamhotspur.com/spurs08/detail.php?productid=ST39060&proddesc=Arsenal+4+-+4+Spurs
Or here:
http://www.tottenhamhotspur.com/news/articles/grabapieceofderbyhistory041108.html
Sad fuckers… apparently they need the money to buy some new headphones or something. I’m tempted to go for the shirt and get Harry to sign it in a creative manner.
“Tottenham are shit” – Harry Redknapp
If the price was right - I bet he would do it too!
*WENGER WATCH*
Arsene Wenger has come out and stated the obvious i.e. the refs are bent:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/teams/a/arsenal/7712255.stm
Although this story was quickly smothered by the manager of Shitkicker FC, Tony Pulis, stating that he was really worried that his nice bunch of brave and plucky lads might get ‘unfair treatment’ because of the nasty Mr Wenger putting a hex on them...
The man is taking the piss:
“People in general can be swayed if they're not watching you play and what you are trying to achieve. They read the papers and unfortunately a lot of people believe what they read. Sometimes the truth is a long, long way away from what people are actually saying.”
One wonders what he sees when he looks in the mirror...
Pulis, you should have laid off Walcott – it will come back to haunt you as now Delap (your 1 trick pony) can be red carded at will with the commentators smoothing over any cracks in the decision with the opiate words:
“the man who [intentionally] injured Theo Walcott”
To the sage nodding of the watching populous... whether it be fair or, indeed, foul. Get used to this chant:
“What’s that coming over the hill? It’s relegation! It’s relegation!”
Oh and while you are doing that; check your match schedule boys and have a look at just who will be sending you down and pounding the final nail in your coffin in the final 'nail biting', 'to the wire' game of the season.
...Hmmm...
Of course this story was then smothered by the bigger story of Alex Ferguson being charged for pointing out to Mike Dean that he is in fact a bell end... one has to wonder at the timing of this. A recent conversation in a ASI discussion thread got me thinking:
ASI_EuroGooner wrote 3 hours ago
"I think arsenal are at their best when people write them off, when they're not expected to win or do well or whatever.Cause then they play without pressure as everyone expects them to lose anyways...it happened last season, even before the season started, we were written off, we all know how that went 4 pts off the leaders and robbed in the champions league. It happened when we played AC milan, people thought kaka,gattuso etc. etc. would give our young guns a lesson in football...of course that didn't happen either. what I'm trying to say here is we play well when we have no weight of expectation on our backs so go ahead...write off THE ARSENAL cause that's how they like it best.but don't be surprised if we pull of an upset against the mancs and make the likes of rooney, berbatov, ronaldo, giggs etc."
DogFace replied 3 hours ago
"More to the point - we are allowed to play well when the weight of gambling liquidity isn't on our backs...
Think about it."
So... with SAF safely bound and gagged and Arsenal written off in the media as 'injury ridden' and 'spineless' – I wonder where the money is going this w/e?
I’ll be watching the back pages very carefully over the next few days...
...I suggest you do the same.
And, as if by magic... as I was typing, look what just appeared:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/eng_prem/7713259.stm
C'mon yous reds!
Although, in the last 20 minutes I felt the game was smothered by the ref somewhat and we missed out on a couple of goal scoring opportunities because of it, would it have made a difference?
Probably not.
I opted for club level in the end as the view is better and the beer available and free. Tamzin Outhwaite sat behind me with Tom Ellis (I think), they have been at every game that I’ve sat up there (and there have been some obscure ones) - they are among the few that make any noise, so I guess that they are ok for *celebrities*. Oh - It was her birthday apparently. Another ‘face’ that is always there is Dara O'Briain – you should see him inhale a pie at half time – 3 bites and the fecker is gone... being Irish - I wonder why he supports Arsenal? I'm not saying that there are no Irish gooners - but its rare (we have more Malaysian and Nigerian gooners than Scottish or Irish) as the is no sectarian history with the club... perhaps that, in itself, is reason enough - or maybe it's just his local team.
*UPDATE*
In a pub conversation; dhjackal (resident Irishman) informs me that 'there are loads' of Irish gooners due to the days of Brady, O'Leary and Stapleton... but 'any fecker wid any sense followed United'.
*END UPDATE*
While I was watching last night; I kept thinking that Roberto Carlos looked fat and past it... I checked his stats in the programme and found out he was actually 1 day younger than me – man; that hurt!
The only negatives last night I could find were that Bendtner and Nasri were having very bad games – it looked like they were stoned half the time or had been out on a massive bender the night before – I don’t think they have got any excuses for not being sharp especially considering the game we have on Saturday.
So all in all last night was frustrating and ultimately a little disappointing but for a laugh click here:
http://shop.tottenhamhotspur.com/spurs08/detail.php?productid=ST39060&proddesc=Arsenal+4+-+4+Spurs
Or here:
http://www.tottenhamhotspur.com/news/articles/grabapieceofderbyhistory041108.html
Sad fuckers… apparently they need the money to buy some new headphones or something. I’m tempted to go for the shirt and get Harry to sign it in a creative manner.
“Tottenham are shit” – Harry Redknapp
If the price was right - I bet he would do it too!
*WENGER WATCH*
Arsene Wenger has come out and stated the obvious i.e. the refs are bent:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/teams/a/arsenal/7712255.stm
Although this story was quickly smothered by the manager of Shitkicker FC, Tony Pulis, stating that he was really worried that his nice bunch of brave and plucky lads might get ‘unfair treatment’ because of the nasty Mr Wenger putting a hex on them...
The man is taking the piss:
“People in general can be swayed if they're not watching you play and what you are trying to achieve. They read the papers and unfortunately a lot of people believe what they read. Sometimes the truth is a long, long way away from what people are actually saying.”
One wonders what he sees when he looks in the mirror...
Pulis, you should have laid off Walcott – it will come back to haunt you as now Delap (your 1 trick pony) can be red carded at will with the commentators smoothing over any cracks in the decision with the opiate words:
“the man who [intentionally] injured Theo Walcott”
To the sage nodding of the watching populous... whether it be fair or, indeed, foul. Get used to this chant:
“What’s that coming over the hill? It’s relegation! It’s relegation!”
Oh and while you are doing that; check your match schedule boys and have a look at just who will be sending you down and pounding the final nail in your coffin in the final 'nail biting', 'to the wire' game of the season.
...Hmmm...
Of course this story was then smothered by the bigger story of Alex Ferguson being charged for pointing out to Mike Dean that he is in fact a bell end... one has to wonder at the timing of this. A recent conversation in a ASI discussion thread got me thinking:
ASI_EuroGooner wrote 3 hours ago
"I think arsenal are at their best when people write them off, when they're not expected to win or do well or whatever.Cause then they play without pressure as everyone expects them to lose anyways...it happened last season, even before the season started, we were written off, we all know how that went 4 pts off the leaders and robbed in the champions league. It happened when we played AC milan, people thought kaka,gattuso etc. etc. would give our young guns a lesson in football...of course that didn't happen either. what I'm trying to say here is we play well when we have no weight of expectation on our backs so go ahead...write off THE ARSENAL cause that's how they like it best.but don't be surprised if we pull of an upset against the mancs and make the likes of rooney, berbatov, ronaldo, giggs etc."
DogFace replied 3 hours ago
"More to the point - we are allowed to play well when the weight of gambling liquidity isn't on our backs...
Think about it."
So... with SAF safely bound and gagged and Arsenal written off in the media as 'injury ridden' and 'spineless' – I wonder where the money is going this w/e?
I’ll be watching the back pages very carefully over the next few days...
...I suggest you do the same.
And, as if by magic... as I was typing, look what just appeared:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/eng_prem/7713259.stm
C'mon yous reds!
Tuesday, 4 November 2008
I've got a bike, you can ride it if you like
Firstly, apologies for no post- Stoke entry. I have man flu... *cough* - it's a bit like man-u except you get better and feel good about yourself after a few days.
So Stoke, Stoke, Stoke... well, were do I start, and more importantly, where do I stop - de-ja-vu weren't it?
Stoke kicked the shit out of us.
Now I don't have a lot of time for Rob Styles as a ref and in the previous post I did suggest that this might be a bent an physical match - but come on... what the fuck was that all about? Did the Stoke players (who look like they have spent some time on a building site) promise build him a right nice brick BBQ/Gazebo if he let them kick the living shit out of all the foreign darkie southerner jessies?
Stoke are new to the premiership, and they require points, I realise, but they are going down. They are the shit-kicker extraordinaire of a side who:
a) isn't wanted here
b) doesn't belong here
Ok- Delap can throw it... but, against all other teams it ends there. Against Arsenal - as we have seen season after season, we go out to play football and the referees allow what is basically aggravated assault on our players. This, for me, it the corruption in the EPL at it's most blatantly obvious.
But, again, we prick our ears for the commentator to say something in our defence after the 9th straight-red challenge goes in only to have Styles wag his finger a bit.. but no - we hear shit like:
"He was absolutely entitled to go for that ball"
This, as a statement in and of itself removed from the context of what actually happened is valid... however - when this, quite unbelievable, drivel of lies and apologies drips over the absolutely fucking obvious like dogshit sprinkels on a Mr. Whippy; it beggars belief, to me, that 90% of people will actually buy/eat it?!
And what about that mugging on Adebayor when he was off the feild of play? What do we get:
"oh,well he made absolutely sure didn't he"
What- 'absolutely sure' that he injured him or put the ball into touch as he was going nowhere near the fucking ball (that was already in touch)!?
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? WAKE UP YOU THICK CUNTS!
Yes, 'Shitkicker-A' was entitled to go for 'Ball' in the game that is called 'football' - however it is not within the rules for Shitcker-A to tackle from behind, straight legged, studs up and take his opponents fucking ankles out. That's actually called an infringement of the rules. It is not, as the Media would condescend to tell you (because you're all obviously too fucking thick to wipe your own arse without Sky telling you to 'check your y-fronts for skid marks because something smells a bit shitty around here'); a brave, gutsy display of commitment and 'heart'...
...Sorry - just had to vomit there...
When Kid-A kicks the shit out of Kid-B for his lunch money we don't slap Kid-A on the back and say:
"well done lad, that was a brave show of heart - you exposed Kid'B's 'frailty' and he fucking deserved it"
Bullying isn't football - I don't care how fucking northern you are.
Conversely, Arsenal were painted as being 'frail', 'lacking spine' and 'maturity', 'top tier totty', 'soft underbelly' and let's not forget, the 'soft touch of the big four' - these worm-ridden platitudes are intended for you to repeat down the pub with your mates - thus giving credence to the lies.
The sports 'journalists' who chug out this shite should be fucking ashamed of themselves... in a desperate effort to apologise and cover up for what was obvious for all to see i.e. a corrupt and fixed game of football; they write nothing but positives and praise for Stoke and nothing but negatives and derision for Arsenal... this is possibly also a way of selling future corruptions i.e. look Arsenal are frail, they are disunited, they will never win anything, believe me, repeat... these aren't the droids you're looking for.
A few of them have painted Wenger as 'a man obsessed' with playing decent football... well - hmm... so he's a nutter because he's a football manager who wants to win by playing the best football he can?
Expect the 'Wenger is a deluded nutter' line to be span out all season long to undermine any observations and/or facts that he shares with the media in his press conferences. You will read it and you will believe it and you will say to your mates down the pub:
"we need more experience - why doesn't Wenger spend some money, these aren't the droids we're looking for!".
If truth be told, in a match like the Stoke match - we could have Jackie Chan and a crack SAS squad across the midfield and defence and we would still have the shit kicked out of us... after all, a boot is a boot and an ankle is an ankle - unfortunately football isn't football.
Not one of the 'respected journalists' points out that Stoke should have had 6 players sent off... where as what actually happened was that Robin van Persie got sent of for a petulant shove... straight red no less - where as the several potential career ending 'tackles' (deliberate violent assaults) that went it didn't even warrant a yellow in the eyes of Styles? No, no - the Stoke lot are brave and have heart... well - I ask the Stoke players to try that shit on with Man U and Chelsea and see what the ref fucking gives you... and what the media gives you. You will be painted as dirty, violent, talentless, shitkickers which, make no mistake - is what you are. And what was with all the Stoke fans - jesus, if I was supporting a team that was a dead cert for relegation I would at least like to see a few good games before we went down.
"at least we beat Arsenal" - the sad deluded, shitkicking fuckers will tell themselves... with their stupid fucking hats.
Stoke fans - your team is the equivalent of Hacketts abused scrap yard rottie, and when you have served your purpose you will be put down without so much as a pat on the head and a bonio for the road.
When are Stoke coming to the Emirates - I am so fucking angry with them!? Divert the coach and send those cunts to Hackney Marshes instead... I know a few boys who would bung the ref some beer tokens to give them a good game. Things are going to kick off big time in the return leg if they are allowed to get away with that at the Emirates...
Still Wenger's reaction confused me - he seemed quite unusually calm and seemed to suggest that this was the 'English game'... we can read into that what we wish; I think possibly a nod towards the ESL with matches like this only adding fuel to his cause - The EPL is a dying brand, it's turned itself inside out and revealed the rotten core - does anyone really believe in this league it any more as a fair and open competition?
Last season Wenger would have been livid, slagging off Styles and facing a fine and a touchline ban. What is Wenger up to? Post the 'derby dissapointment' match he made the cryptic statement in response to the title bid:
"We know the truth on the inside and that is not what has been projected on the outside. We know what we have to do."
This is a different Wenger and a different Arsenal.
Man, as an aside - I'm typing this while watching the Liverpool V Atletico match... what a fucking joke of a penalty - does anybody take this game seriously? I like Gerrard... but - he's a little cheating fucker in a Liverpool shirt - make a note of that ref! Gah - where can I find the ref - BBC have taken it down... and none of these post match talking heads are giving his name out?! Why.
Ahhg... got dragged into a 606 discussion about Wengers delayed response to the Stoke match - maybe he had man-flu too, he nailed it. I need not continue... you know, It depresses me the modern day fan - watching them in the kop in the Liverpool game as Gerrard took his 'penalty' - all looking nervous as if it meant something... in their scalfs... and hats.
Sad deluded losers... like me.
Right - I'm off to defend Wenger on 606!
Oh.. it appears that:
"This article has been temporarily hidden, because a member of our Moderation Team has referred it to the Community Team for a decision as to whether it contravenes the House Rules in some way. We will do everything we can to ensure that a decision is made as quickly as possible."
Whoops, my fault.
FYI - the ref was 'Mariano Pernia'... hang on, isn't that the area between the cunt and the arsehole?
...no - that's perineum, but close enough for me.
*UPDATE* - my mistake Pernia was the player, the Ref was 'Martin Hansson' - curse you BBC's 'as-it-happened' text feed!
So Stoke, Stoke, Stoke... well, were do I start, and more importantly, where do I stop - de-ja-vu weren't it?
Stoke kicked the shit out of us.
Now I don't have a lot of time for Rob Styles as a ref and in the previous post I did suggest that this might be a bent an physical match - but come on... what the fuck was that all about? Did the Stoke players (who look like they have spent some time on a building site) promise build him a right nice brick BBQ/Gazebo if he let them kick the living shit out of all the foreign darkie southerner jessies?
Stoke are new to the premiership, and they require points, I realise, but they are going down. They are the shit-kicker extraordinaire of a side who:
a) isn't wanted here
b) doesn't belong here
Ok- Delap can throw it... but, against all other teams it ends there. Against Arsenal - as we have seen season after season, we go out to play football and the referees allow what is basically aggravated assault on our players. This, for me, it the corruption in the EPL at it's most blatantly obvious.
But, again, we prick our ears for the commentator to say something in our defence after the 9th straight-red challenge goes in only to have Styles wag his finger a bit.. but no - we hear shit like:
"He was absolutely entitled to go for that ball"
This, as a statement in and of itself removed from the context of what actually happened is valid... however - when this, quite unbelievable, drivel of lies and apologies drips over the absolutely fucking obvious like dogshit sprinkels on a Mr. Whippy; it beggars belief, to me, that 90% of people will actually buy/eat it?!
And what about that mugging on Adebayor when he was off the feild of play? What do we get:
"oh,well he made absolutely sure didn't he"
What- 'absolutely sure' that he injured him or put the ball into touch as he was going nowhere near the fucking ball (that was already in touch)!?
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? WAKE UP YOU THICK CUNTS!
Yes, 'Shitkicker-A' was entitled to go for 'Ball' in the game that is called 'football' - however it is not within the rules for Shitcker-A to tackle from behind, straight legged, studs up and take his opponents fucking ankles out. That's actually called an infringement of the rules. It is not, as the Media would condescend to tell you (because you're all obviously too fucking thick to wipe your own arse without Sky telling you to 'check your y-fronts for skid marks because something smells a bit shitty around here'); a brave, gutsy display of commitment and 'heart'...
...Sorry - just had to vomit there...
When Kid-A kicks the shit out of Kid-B for his lunch money we don't slap Kid-A on the back and say:
"well done lad, that was a brave show of heart - you exposed Kid'B's 'frailty' and he fucking deserved it"
Bullying isn't football - I don't care how fucking northern you are.
Conversely, Arsenal were painted as being 'frail', 'lacking spine' and 'maturity', 'top tier totty', 'soft underbelly' and let's not forget, the 'soft touch of the big four' - these worm-ridden platitudes are intended for you to repeat down the pub with your mates - thus giving credence to the lies.
The sports 'journalists' who chug out this shite should be fucking ashamed of themselves... in a desperate effort to apologise and cover up for what was obvious for all to see i.e. a corrupt and fixed game of football; they write nothing but positives and praise for Stoke and nothing but negatives and derision for Arsenal... this is possibly also a way of selling future corruptions i.e. look Arsenal are frail, they are disunited, they will never win anything, believe me, repeat... these aren't the droids you're looking for.
A few of them have painted Wenger as 'a man obsessed' with playing decent football... well - hmm... so he's a nutter because he's a football manager who wants to win by playing the best football he can?
Expect the 'Wenger is a deluded nutter' line to be span out all season long to undermine any observations and/or facts that he shares with the media in his press conferences. You will read it and you will believe it and you will say to your mates down the pub:
"we need more experience - why doesn't Wenger spend some money, these aren't the droids we're looking for!".
If truth be told, in a match like the Stoke match - we could have Jackie Chan and a crack SAS squad across the midfield and defence and we would still have the shit kicked out of us... after all, a boot is a boot and an ankle is an ankle - unfortunately football isn't football.
Not one of the 'respected journalists' points out that Stoke should have had 6 players sent off... where as what actually happened was that Robin van Persie got sent of for a petulant shove... straight red no less - where as the several potential career ending 'tackles' (deliberate violent assaults) that went it didn't even warrant a yellow in the eyes of Styles? No, no - the Stoke lot are brave and have heart... well - I ask the Stoke players to try that shit on with Man U and Chelsea and see what the ref fucking gives you... and what the media gives you. You will be painted as dirty, violent, talentless, shitkickers which, make no mistake - is what you are. And what was with all the Stoke fans - jesus, if I was supporting a team that was a dead cert for relegation I would at least like to see a few good games before we went down.
"at least we beat Arsenal" - the sad deluded, shitkicking fuckers will tell themselves... with their stupid fucking hats.
Does nobody remember Eduardo... there's more at stake here that 3 points!?
Stoke fans - your team is the equivalent of Hacketts abused scrap yard rottie, and when you have served your purpose you will be put down without so much as a pat on the head and a bonio for the road.
When are Stoke coming to the Emirates - I am so fucking angry with them!? Divert the coach and send those cunts to Hackney Marshes instead... I know a few boys who would bung the ref some beer tokens to give them a good game. Things are going to kick off big time in the return leg if they are allowed to get away with that at the Emirates...
Still Wenger's reaction confused me - he seemed quite unusually calm and seemed to suggest that this was the 'English game'... we can read into that what we wish; I think possibly a nod towards the ESL with matches like this only adding fuel to his cause - The EPL is a dying brand, it's turned itself inside out and revealed the rotten core - does anyone really believe in this league it any more as a fair and open competition?
Last season Wenger would have been livid, slagging off Styles and facing a fine and a touchline ban. What is Wenger up to? Post the 'derby dissapointment' match he made the cryptic statement in response to the title bid:
"We know the truth on the inside and that is not what has been projected on the outside. We know what we have to do."
This is a different Wenger and a different Arsenal.
Man, as an aside - I'm typing this while watching the Liverpool V Atletico match... what a fucking joke of a penalty - does anybody take this game seriously? I like Gerrard... but - he's a little cheating fucker in a Liverpool shirt - make a note of that ref! Gah - where can I find the ref - BBC have taken it down... and none of these post match talking heads are giving his name out?! Why.
Ahhg... got dragged into a 606 discussion about Wengers delayed response to the Stoke match - maybe he had man-flu too, he nailed it. I need not continue... you know, It depresses me the modern day fan - watching them in the kop in the Liverpool game as Gerrard took his 'penalty' - all looking nervous as if it meant something... in their scalfs... and hats.
Sad deluded losers... like me.
Right - I'm off to defend Wenger on 606!
Oh.. it appears that:
"This article has been temporarily hidden, because a member of our Moderation Team has referred it to the Community Team for a decision as to whether it contravenes the House Rules in some way. We will do everything we can to ensure that a decision is made as quickly as possible."
Whoops, my fault.
FYI - the ref was 'Mariano Pernia'... hang on, isn't that the area between the cunt and the arsehole?
...no - that's perineum, but close enough for me.
*UPDATE* - my mistake Pernia was the player, the Ref was 'Martin Hansson' - curse you BBC's 'as-it-happened' text feed!
Wednesday, 22 October 2008
I fell in love with the dreams of children
I hate matches like that... well – I love them too, you know the ones I mean, the matches that are good games for the neutral to watch. Fenerbahce were obviously far from great but going into the game there were a lot of negative noises floating about... i.e. how the home crowed would get to us, how Fenerbahce never lose at home, how our makeshift defence was too frail to cope – etc.
On the Facebook intelligentsia discussion group (where I periodically lurk) all of these dark clouds seemed to have gathered and there were predictive mumbles of 0-1, 1-1 and 2-2 being the end result – the overwhelming consensus was that: "it would be a tough game". I alone predicted: "We are going to smash them 1-4" – so I was almost right. I even put my money where my mouth was and went large on HT/FT Arsenal/Arsenal and got fantastic odds :-D. I'm yet to figure out where all this doom and gloom came from – the talking heads in the commentary box were doing their bit pre-match to pour water on our chances... but think, ignore that cunt, his ilk and what the papers tell you – remember we are the team who fucked AC Milan in their own back yard – so who the fuck are Fenerbahce anyway?
That's what right minded Arsenal fans should have been thinking... there's no way we were going to lose that game – even with Song and Silvestre as centre backs.
Fenerbahce, give them their due, were right battlers and never gave up on attacking – they had belief right up until half time that they could score themselves right back into the match. Full respect to them – I was a very nervous gooner and was praying for the half time whistle to preserve out 2 goal advantage... in the dressing room when the adrenaline starts to wane and you are 1-3 down – it's much harder to get motivated than if you were 2-3.
The whistle came and I breathed a sigh of relief.
The half time period was spent online discussing who was more of a liability at CB; Silvestre or Song – I thought Silvestre looked out of place and Song was getting exposed in the air... Silvestre also tends to hump it up field rather than play it out, which I felt upset our flow a bit... the Fenerbahce goal went in off Silvestre but it came off a foul on Song (who may or may not have had enough height to clear it) so I couldn't really hold either of them responsible for it. Right after the break though our nit-picking was silenced when Song scored with a Silvestre assist... hey ho!
But let's rewind to the first half for a second. The first two goals were absolute magic – and all of it went through Fabregas... it looked all too easy for first Adebayor then Walcott to get in behind the defence but both movements were timed to perfection. Fabregas was awesome. His vision and skill made them look like schoolboys twice within 70 seconds – Ade and Theo just had to keep their nerve... which, of course, they did and they finished like they were on the training ground... I like to think that Fabregas caught Aragones' eye on the way off the field with a knowing smirk, "not bad for a Catalan eh? Just you wait for the home leg – then I'll really going to punish you old man for leaving me on the bench in the Euros!"
The other midfielder who showed some ambition to get a regular start was Diaby. Diaby had a blinder; he chased balls like a spaniel on crack and attacked/finished like a seasoned striker! We've seen Diaby do this before... the Carling Cup final against Chelsea is an occasion which springs to mind – if he can stay injury free and focused then I expect to see much more of him as a versatile regular adding the depth in options we need in the midfield.
Much was made of the Fenerbahce fans reputation of being thuggish and uncompromising – but not so, they struck me intelligent and devoted. They wanted to unsettle us – but it didn't work. They wanted to unsettle the officials – again, it didn't work... and at the end they had no complaints... they even applauded Arsenal off the field – so hardly the bunch of stabby Turkish hooligans that they were painted as... maybe they only get a bit stabby and angry when they feel hard done by I wonder?
Talking head #1 (the one spewing a torrent of inane shit under the guise of commentary) tripped over his lying tongue with this 'off the cuff' (i.e. pre written card with a list of things to drop in if he could) remark:
"Oh the Fenerbahce fans are getting at the officials but it's all too easy to blame the referee when your heroes are having an off day."
It was in a tone of voice that was so irritatingly condescending and obviously directed that, in a bid to purge to poison from my ear, I involuntarily shouted: "FUCK OFF" before he finished his sentence... that'll be the Tourette's again! This illustrates to me that this year we are going to be robbed again... although I concede that I actively look for it so my perception may be bias. The template is set and the criminals all briefed with their alibis and cover stories... you tell me - who else was that comment meant for?
The mornings papers reaffirmed my opinion... it was all about Manchester United and Berbatov's 'exhilarating' display against the mighty Celtic... Arsenal – 3 pages in, buried. Sky sports news this morning even went as far as to show the goals/scores from every other game last night and miss the Arsenal match out completely!
Fuckers.
Firstly the mighty Berbatov's goals were both fucking offside right and secondly they beat Celtic at home. Lets look at the facts:
a) United were unbeaten in the last 16 European home games.
b) Celtic have lost 17 of their last 18 European games.
So, considering this; is the fact that Manchester United cheated their way to a 3-0 victory over Celtic really news?
Conversely let's look at the basic facts of the Arsenal game:
a) Fenerbahce were undefeated at home in 15 European games.
b) The Arsenal team's average age was 22 and cost less to assemble than the 'offside goal-hanger' Berbatov's transfer fee.
c) Arsenal played some proper football and beat Fenerbahce fair and square in a glorious open game that was 'great for the neutral' 2 goals to 5.
So answer me this – in retrospect, which game/result is more newsworthy/praiseworthy and why do I see nothing but pictures of Berbatov's smiling fucking face this morning?
I think I preferred him at Tottenham.
Let's now look forward to the game against West Ham at the weekend. It does not bode well, in my book, that last night's result was so crudely brushed under the media carpet. It does not bode well that the talking heads are apologising in advance for the referee and officials... it does not bode well at all.
Personally I think we are going to smash them... although lets look at a worst case scenario:
Howard Webb gets to ref the match.
Webb, as we know, is right up the Hammers arse – I guess this is because a significant percentage of West Ham fans are racist thugs and he's an ex copper... so he feels right at home in his workplace.
But even with Webb giving the Hammers 'Carte Blanche' taciticy to kick the shit out of us and his itchy twitchy whistle finger in and around the Arsenal penalty area; I still rate our chances. West Ham are in chaos due to the bankruptcy of Iceland (see previous post somewhere); they need to raise around 50 million quid in the next transfer window to avoid administration... so all the players will have one eye on the door and hopefully be looking to show some individual talent i.e. play a game of football rather than shut up shop and stick the boot in. Also Zola isn't Curbishly, he's new, naive and idealistic; and I can't see him pre match telling his team to "kick us out of the game, play for a draw and trip over your own feet anywhere in a scoring position" as he'll be looking to attract cheap young talent and loan deals in January to play his style of football... we also have nice, squeaky clean English Theo 'I'm-not-a-granny-fucker' Walcott – and if worst comes to worst – players looking at pay cuts and transfers wouldn't dare kick him off the field and risk the public backlash if they broke him.
No fear Theo!
Let's see what happens...
On the Facebook intelligentsia discussion group (where I periodically lurk) all of these dark clouds seemed to have gathered and there were predictive mumbles of 0-1, 1-1 and 2-2 being the end result – the overwhelming consensus was that: "it would be a tough game". I alone predicted: "We are going to smash them 1-4" – so I was almost right. I even put my money where my mouth was and went large on HT/FT Arsenal/Arsenal and got fantastic odds :-D. I'm yet to figure out where all this doom and gloom came from – the talking heads in the commentary box were doing their bit pre-match to pour water on our chances... but think, ignore that cunt, his ilk and what the papers tell you – remember we are the team who fucked AC Milan in their own back yard – so who the fuck are Fenerbahce anyway?
That's what right minded Arsenal fans should have been thinking... there's no way we were going to lose that game – even with Song and Silvestre as centre backs.
Fenerbahce, give them their due, were right battlers and never gave up on attacking – they had belief right up until half time that they could score themselves right back into the match. Full respect to them – I was a very nervous gooner and was praying for the half time whistle to preserve out 2 goal advantage... in the dressing room when the adrenaline starts to wane and you are 1-3 down – it's much harder to get motivated than if you were 2-3.
The whistle came and I breathed a sigh of relief.
The half time period was spent online discussing who was more of a liability at CB; Silvestre or Song – I thought Silvestre looked out of place and Song was getting exposed in the air... Silvestre also tends to hump it up field rather than play it out, which I felt upset our flow a bit... the Fenerbahce goal went in off Silvestre but it came off a foul on Song (who may or may not have had enough height to clear it) so I couldn't really hold either of them responsible for it. Right after the break though our nit-picking was silenced when Song scored with a Silvestre assist... hey ho!
But let's rewind to the first half for a second. The first two goals were absolute magic – and all of it went through Fabregas... it looked all too easy for first Adebayor then Walcott to get in behind the defence but both movements were timed to perfection. Fabregas was awesome. His vision and skill made them look like schoolboys twice within 70 seconds – Ade and Theo just had to keep their nerve... which, of course, they did and they finished like they were on the training ground... I like to think that Fabregas caught Aragones' eye on the way off the field with a knowing smirk, "not bad for a Catalan eh? Just you wait for the home leg – then I'll really going to punish you old man for leaving me on the bench in the Euros!"
The other midfielder who showed some ambition to get a regular start was Diaby. Diaby had a blinder; he chased balls like a spaniel on crack and attacked/finished like a seasoned striker! We've seen Diaby do this before... the Carling Cup final against Chelsea is an occasion which springs to mind – if he can stay injury free and focused then I expect to see much more of him as a versatile regular adding the depth in options we need in the midfield.
Much was made of the Fenerbahce fans reputation of being thuggish and uncompromising – but not so, they struck me intelligent and devoted. They wanted to unsettle us – but it didn't work. They wanted to unsettle the officials – again, it didn't work... and at the end they had no complaints... they even applauded Arsenal off the field – so hardly the bunch of stabby Turkish hooligans that they were painted as... maybe they only get a bit stabby and angry when they feel hard done by I wonder?
Talking head #1 (the one spewing a torrent of inane shit under the guise of commentary) tripped over his lying tongue with this 'off the cuff' (i.e. pre written card with a list of things to drop in if he could) remark:
"Oh the Fenerbahce fans are getting at the officials but it's all too easy to blame the referee when your heroes are having an off day."
It was in a tone of voice that was so irritatingly condescending and obviously directed that, in a bid to purge to poison from my ear, I involuntarily shouted: "FUCK OFF" before he finished his sentence... that'll be the Tourette's again! This illustrates to me that this year we are going to be robbed again... although I concede that I actively look for it so my perception may be bias. The template is set and the criminals all briefed with their alibis and cover stories... you tell me - who else was that comment meant for?
The mornings papers reaffirmed my opinion... it was all about Manchester United and Berbatov's 'exhilarating' display against the mighty Celtic... Arsenal – 3 pages in, buried. Sky sports news this morning even went as far as to show the goals/scores from every other game last night and miss the Arsenal match out completely!
Fuckers.
Firstly the mighty Berbatov's goals were both fucking offside right and secondly they beat Celtic at home. Lets look at the facts:
a) United were unbeaten in the last 16 European home games.
b) Celtic have lost 17 of their last 18 European games.
So, considering this; is the fact that Manchester United cheated their way to a 3-0 victory over Celtic really news?
Conversely let's look at the basic facts of the Arsenal game:
a) Fenerbahce were undefeated at home in 15 European games.
b) The Arsenal team's average age was 22 and cost less to assemble than the 'offside goal-hanger' Berbatov's transfer fee.
c) Arsenal played some proper football and beat Fenerbahce fair and square in a glorious open game that was 'great for the neutral' 2 goals to 5.
So answer me this – in retrospect, which game/result is more newsworthy/praiseworthy and why do I see nothing but pictures of Berbatov's smiling fucking face this morning?
I think I preferred him at Tottenham.
Let's now look forward to the game against West Ham at the weekend. It does not bode well, in my book, that last night's result was so crudely brushed under the media carpet. It does not bode well that the talking heads are apologising in advance for the referee and officials... it does not bode well at all.
Personally I think we are going to smash them... although lets look at a worst case scenario:
Howard Webb gets to ref the match.
Webb, as we know, is right up the Hammers arse – I guess this is because a significant percentage of West Ham fans are racist thugs and he's an ex copper... so he feels right at home in his workplace.
But even with Webb giving the Hammers 'Carte Blanche' taciticy to kick the shit out of us and his itchy twitchy whistle finger in and around the Arsenal penalty area; I still rate our chances. West Ham are in chaos due to the bankruptcy of Iceland (see previous post somewhere); they need to raise around 50 million quid in the next transfer window to avoid administration... so all the players will have one eye on the door and hopefully be looking to show some individual talent i.e. play a game of football rather than shut up shop and stick the boot in. Also Zola isn't Curbishly, he's new, naive and idealistic; and I can't see him pre match telling his team to "kick us out of the game, play for a draw and trip over your own feet anywhere in a scoring position" as he'll be looking to attract cheap young talent and loan deals in January to play his style of football... we also have nice, squeaky clean English Theo 'I'm-not-a-granny-fucker' Walcott – and if worst comes to worst – players looking at pay cuts and transfers wouldn't dare kick him off the field and risk the public backlash if they broke him.
No fear Theo!
Let's see what happens...
Thursday, 28 August 2008
Everyone knows Monday night means wrestling
Well... I for one feel let down – I said 7-0 on aggregate Arsene; not 6-0 ffs, Bentner you're useless with 1 goal and 2 assists, call yourself a footballer! You're 20 years old, we expect more than that – you're having a fucking nightmare!
"C'mon Arsenal, C'mon Arsenal, C'mon Arsenal"
...Ahem...
Also, apart from a few media prompted bell-ends booing Adebayor, the biggest disappointment of the evening was when Liverpool spawned a late goal to effectively add 15 million to their transfer kitty... I wonder who they'll sign, oh actually – that's right, I don't care. Curse you Liverpool – we (myself and PieFace) had just bought a second pint and were gleefully looking forward to a penalty shootout and all the extreme close-ups of angst-ridden scouse faces, in particular the clawing fingers and the slow motion 'Nooooooooooooooooo' back-dropped to the image of a stunned Gerrard falling to his knees as the crucial spot kick skies into row n.
Broken dreams eh... that's Liverpool FC for you!
Still, as we lamented Liverpool's undeserved win – it gave us some conversation as to what the mornings back pages might bring us:
We both agreed that an image of Gerrard/Liverpool would make the back pages where as the Arsenal match would be on the inside.
We came up with the headline "Lucky Liverpool Leave it Late" as a possible contender.
PieFace reckoned that the papers would be scathing of the Liverpool performance where as I reckoned that they wouldn't... except for the Guardian who would probably tell it how it was. We had a bet on how the Sun would play the story, mine was for them to cast Liverpool as the chirpy lovable scousers who managed to show their 'class' against a plucky Belgium lot in a bid to gain some media territory into Merseyside. PieFace reckoned that the knives would be out:
________________________________________
From: DogFace
Sent: 28 August 2008 10:03
To: PieFace
Subject: RE: Scathing?
Dah – The Sun is my most hated paper… even Everton fans won't buy The Sun after Hillsborough – a close second is the Daily Mail – The Metro is a watered down Evening Standard which is, in turn, a diluted Daily Mail.
Fair play to the Metro though for sticking in a well deserved boot.
The Guardian went with: "Kuyt strikes late to save limp and lucky Liverpool" – didn't think of the 'limp' in addition to 'late' and 'lucky'... I would have gone with 'lack-lustre' though - so we were almost right!
http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2008/aug/28/championsleague.liverpool
Their report on the Arsenal match is good too:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2008/aug/28/championsleague.arsenal
________________________________________
From: PieFace
Sent: 28 August 2008 09:55
To: DogFace
Subject: RE: Scathing?
Your favourite paper the Metro was quite scathing this morning - adjectives like "stuttering" and "misfiring" and acknowledging that Liverpool were lucky to get to extra time.
The Sun report is a disgrace to journalism - you were right - a pathetic pandering to try and win back their scouse readership. Doomed to failure; they might as well have the headline: LIVERPOOOL: W&NKERS. After Hillsborough Liverpool fans will despise The Sun till they die.
________________________________________
From: DogFace
Sent: 28 August 2008 09:23
To: PieFace
Subject: Scathing?
These were the first two I found:
From: PieFace
Sent: 28 August 2008 09:55
To: DogFace
Subject: RE: Scathing?
Your favourite paper the Metro was quite scathing this morning - adjectives like "stuttering" and "misfiring" and acknowledging that Liverpool were lucky to get to extra time.
The Sun report is a disgrace to journalism - you were right - a pathetic pandering to try and win back their scouse readership. Doomed to failure; they might as well have the headline: LIVERPOOOL: W&NKERS. After Hillsborough Liverpool fans will despise The Sun till they die.
________________________________________
From: DogFace
Sent: 28 August 2008 09:23
To: PieFace
Subject: Scathing?
These were the first two I found:
The back pages read "Gerrard injured and misses England qualifiers"... whatever.
________________________________________
Eduardo Adebayor
Nasri Fabregas Song Walcott
Clichy Gallas Toure Sanga
Almunia
Nasri Fabregas Song Walcott
Clichy Gallas Toure Sanga
Almunia
With plenty of other options to suit in RvP, Rosicky, Bentner, Eboue and Denielson and the youth players coming through – I think that the core squad is awesome! So... do we really need another signing and why do I keep hearing from the fans that we need to 'spend big' to win anything? If anything we need some useful utility players who can make up the numbers.
I'm looking forward more to the Newcastle encounter now... and shouting moderate abuse at Owen if he comes near me (as he'll be out to impress with the England qualifiers coming up). Although it is on Sky so I'm expecting some dodgyness – does anyone know who the ref is?
PS - Whoever came up with the "You're going home to have some dinner" chant for the fans leaving early I salute you - very funny.
Saturday, 24 May 2008
We'll keep the red flag flying here.
Whoop, Quids in!
The CL final was an unusual beast, to be fair my speculation about the match was hopelessly naïve but thankfully correct (with regards to my Betfair Profit/Loss). I was very confused – the ref seemed to be on the draw the whole way. This was achieved by letting the teams take it in turns to kick the shit out of each other, first Man-u on Chelsea – then the other way around.
The pitch was a lumpy, boggy mess and nullified the extra skill of the Man-u team – Chelsea had the idea to let them run themselves out in the first half, lump it at Drogba and come back in the second – it was a reasonable plan and it proved for some uninspired play; leaving frustration, violence, tension and dodgyness to ‘spice it up’ for the neutral observer... yeah – I hate to say that enjoyed it – but only because it was clear that I’d put my cash on the predetermined result at 90 minutes.
There was one moment, ten minutes or so after Man-u scored, when Grant (who had been very quiet) strolled up to the fourth official and had a word in his shell-like – all caught on camera – the run of play then turned and Chelsea were dominant. Was there a bidding war going on? On the pitch? On camera? Live?
Even I find that hard one to believe!
As an Arsenal supporter; once Ronaldo and Terry had missed their respective penalties, in the nail biting climax, it was a win-win scenario. One of them would be in tears pretty quickly, the piss-taking emails would be sent and the creative chants would ensue next season.
Ronaldo, the ‘best player in the world’ choked when the pressure was on... I actually predicted this – if I could have put money on it I would have done... I wonder what the odds would have been? I do feel a bit sorry for Chelsea fans as the game was in the bag – and the ‘safe feet’ of their captain-fantastic were stepping up... so just what happened to deny them?
Let’s rewind back to October 2007 when England strolled onto the swanky Astroturf at the Luzhniki Stadium for the Euro 2008 qualifier against Russia. Right after that match the plastic pitch was torn up and turfed out just in time for the Russian winter... alas the turf failed to root into the Moscow tundra and after much to-ing and fro-ing had to be replaced again a mere 3 weeks before the CL final game. The new turf that cost an arm and a leg was ‘unfortunately’ fucked in transit... how unfortunate – I wonder just who could have the connections in Russia to lean on the haulage company that delivered it to take a detour via the Monsanto aisle of the Moscow B&Q? Oh hang on – yeah... I do know someone who could possibly call in a few favors and swing that one!
So... by minute 120 the quagmire of a pitch, that was initially laid in the favor of the blues, was barely clinging on to the ground as a certain Mr. John Terry stepped up to plant his foot in precisely the same spot as the previous 9 penalty takers.
We know how the rest went... Ronaldo found religion and Ashley got a losers medal.
Ce la vie – all I can say is that you reap what you sow... and sometimes, as in the case of Chelsea, literally!
---------------------------------------------------------
RE: F****ing Football
From: PieFace
Sent: 24 May 2008 09:30:56
To: Chelsea Brian; DogFace
It's actually quite encouraging to see I will still be as passionate about the Gooners in 25 years time! See you both this Saturday
PieFace
---------------------------------------------------------
RE: F****ing Football
From: Chelsea Brian
Sent: 23 May 2008 21:19:28
To: PieFace; DogFace
Sorry guys. I owe you a big apology. I should not have let depression get the better of me and express ill-considered comments - particularly to you too lads. A few consoling beers does't promote a true perspective in one's thinking either but sadly I can offer no excuse for my bad manners as there isn't one. You are quite right. There are many things more important than football and celebrating Sophia's and Elena's birthdays is one of them. As you say there is no need to get involved in an argument about it and if I am still welcome DogFace I would love to be there with you next Saturday.
I guess my display is an example that you are never too old to be stupid/irrational/human! That's not said as lightly or as frivolously as it appears. When I became a Dad/middle aged person I assumed the necessary wisdom and the "comfort zone" to operate within would come with that and age. It doesn't!! I will be 60 this year yet it feels like I am the same idiot I was when I was 16 and I have learned almost nothing since.
I guess I will be re-born as an ant!
Chelsea Brian
---------------------------------------------------------
RE: F****ing Football
From: DogFace
Sent: 23 May 2008 13:33:11
To: Chelsea Brian
Hi Chelsea Brian,
I'm sorry that you feel that you cannot celebrate Sophia's third birthday because Chelsea lost a game of football… although I fail to see how this is any way relevant to my mothers attitude to life?
As I have said in the past – I do not wish to get into heated discussions about football with regards to elements of corruption within the game and I certainly do not wish to be ‘indulged’. Although, as an aside - didn't Avram Grant have something to say on the subject recently?
As a third point... with regards to the reaction you feel you are getting from ‘every supporter from every other club in the Football League’ I would suggest that taking out your frustrations on myself and PieFace (as the closest Arsenal supporters to hand) is an unproductive course of action.
One hopes objectivity prevails.
DogFace
---------------------------------------------------------
From: Chelsea Brian
To: PieFace; DogFace
Subject: F****ing Football
Date: Thu, 22 May 2008 00:06:46 +0100
Hi Guys
REALLY ABSOLUTELY TOTALLY COMNPREHENSIVELY P****** off & F***** off with tonight's result and the reaction to it from every supporter of every other club in the Football League (other than Chelsea) including Arsenal). I don't need or want this and I certainly do not need and I do not feel like indulging DoghFace's views on the game - If A are so much better let's see you F****ing challenge Man U - nobody else has apart from the Blues for the last 2 seasons - or are you just passing on the grounds of budget control or is it Manyana again?!!! I am so angry amd absolutely AAAAAAAAAAARGH I hav e to say I will pass on the meet for the 31st - like you said DogFace - your Mum didn't humour matters she disagreed with - and I guess that is something that now influences me. Too choked at the moment to correspond coherently but I guess I will be more objective with the passage of time.
Talk later.
Chelsea Brian
The CL final was an unusual beast, to be fair my speculation about the match was hopelessly naïve but thankfully correct (with regards to my Betfair Profit/Loss). I was very confused – the ref seemed to be on the draw the whole way. This was achieved by letting the teams take it in turns to kick the shit out of each other, first Man-u on Chelsea – then the other way around.
The pitch was a lumpy, boggy mess and nullified the extra skill of the Man-u team – Chelsea had the idea to let them run themselves out in the first half, lump it at Drogba and come back in the second – it was a reasonable plan and it proved for some uninspired play; leaving frustration, violence, tension and dodgyness to ‘spice it up’ for the neutral observer... yeah – I hate to say that enjoyed it – but only because it was clear that I’d put my cash on the predetermined result at 90 minutes.
There was one moment, ten minutes or so after Man-u scored, when Grant (who had been very quiet) strolled up to the fourth official and had a word in his shell-like – all caught on camera – the run of play then turned and Chelsea were dominant. Was there a bidding war going on? On the pitch? On camera? Live?
Even I find that hard one to believe!
As an Arsenal supporter; once Ronaldo and Terry had missed their respective penalties, in the nail biting climax, it was a win-win scenario. One of them would be in tears pretty quickly, the piss-taking emails would be sent and the creative chants would ensue next season.
Ronaldo, the ‘best player in the world’ choked when the pressure was on... I actually predicted this – if I could have put money on it I would have done... I wonder what the odds would have been? I do feel a bit sorry for Chelsea fans as the game was in the bag – and the ‘safe feet’ of their captain-fantastic were stepping up... so just what happened to deny them?
Let’s rewind back to October 2007 when England strolled onto the swanky Astroturf at the Luzhniki Stadium for the Euro 2008 qualifier against Russia. Right after that match the plastic pitch was torn up and turfed out just in time for the Russian winter... alas the turf failed to root into the Moscow tundra and after much to-ing and fro-ing had to be replaced again a mere 3 weeks before the CL final game. The new turf that cost an arm and a leg was ‘unfortunately’ fucked in transit... how unfortunate – I wonder just who could have the connections in Russia to lean on the haulage company that delivered it to take a detour via the Monsanto aisle of the Moscow B&Q? Oh hang on – yeah... I do know someone who could possibly call in a few favors and swing that one!
So... by minute 120 the quagmire of a pitch, that was initially laid in the favor of the blues, was barely clinging on to the ground as a certain Mr. John Terry stepped up to plant his foot in precisely the same spot as the previous 9 penalty takers.
We know how the rest went... Ronaldo found religion and Ashley got a losers medal.
Ce la vie – all I can say is that you reap what you sow... and sometimes, as in the case of Chelsea, literally!
---------------------------------------------------------
RE: F****ing Football
From: PieFace
Sent: 24 May 2008 09:30:56
To: Chelsea Brian; DogFace
It's actually quite encouraging to see I will still be as passionate about the Gooners in 25 years time! See you both this Saturday
PieFace
---------------------------------------------------------
RE: F****ing Football
From: Chelsea Brian
Sent: 23 May 2008 21:19:28
To: PieFace; DogFace
Sorry guys. I owe you a big apology. I should not have let depression get the better of me and express ill-considered comments - particularly to you too lads. A few consoling beers does't promote a true perspective in one's thinking either but sadly I can offer no excuse for my bad manners as there isn't one. You are quite right. There are many things more important than football and celebrating Sophia's and Elena's birthdays is one of them. As you say there is no need to get involved in an argument about it and if I am still welcome DogFace I would love to be there with you next Saturday.
I guess my display is an example that you are never too old to be stupid/irrational/human! That's not said as lightly or as frivolously as it appears. When I became a Dad/middle aged person I assumed the necessary wisdom and the "comfort zone" to operate within would come with that and age. It doesn't!! I will be 60 this year yet it feels like I am the same idiot I was when I was 16 and I have learned almost nothing since.
I guess I will be re-born as an ant!
Chelsea Brian
---------------------------------------------------------
RE: F****ing Football
From: DogFace
Sent: 23 May 2008 13:33:11
To: Chelsea Brian
Hi Chelsea Brian,
I'm sorry that you feel that you cannot celebrate Sophia's third birthday because Chelsea lost a game of football… although I fail to see how this is any way relevant to my mothers attitude to life?
As I have said in the past – I do not wish to get into heated discussions about football with regards to elements of corruption within the game and I certainly do not wish to be ‘indulged’. Although, as an aside - didn't Avram Grant have something to say on the subject recently?
As a third point... with regards to the reaction you feel you are getting from ‘every supporter from every other club in the Football League’ I would suggest that taking out your frustrations on myself and PieFace (as the closest Arsenal supporters to hand) is an unproductive course of action.
One hopes objectivity prevails.
DogFace
---------------------------------------------------------
From: Chelsea Brian
To: PieFace; DogFace
Subject: F****ing Football
Date: Thu, 22 May 2008 00:06:46 +0100
Hi Guys
REALLY ABSOLUTELY TOTALLY COMNPREHENSIVELY P****** off & F***** off with tonight's result and the reaction to it from every supporter of every other club in the Football League (other than Chelsea) including Arsenal). I don't need or want this and I certainly do not need and I do not feel like indulging DoghFace's views on the game - If A are so much better let's see you F****ing challenge Man U - nobody else has apart from the Blues for the last 2 seasons - or are you just passing on the grounds of budget control or is it Manyana again?!!! I am so angry amd absolutely AAAAAAAAAAARGH I hav e to say I will pass on the meet for the 31st - like you said DogFace - your Mum didn't humour matters she disagreed with - and I guess that is something that now influences me. Too choked at the moment to correspond coherently but I guess I will be more objective with the passage of time.
Talk later.
Chelsea Brian
Tuesday, 20 May 2008
Above the sound of ideologies clashing
Hello again, now is that crazy time of the season where the transfer rumours are flying... should I touch on them? Yeah – go on then!
Inbox:
Samir Nasri from Marseille = Reassuringly expensive.
Miguel Veloso from Sporting Lisbon = This boy just wants some Premiership action i.e. wages – but feisty and Flaminiesque!
Alberto Aquilani from Roma = His scumbag agent is just trying his luck.
Sebastian Frey from Fiorentina = Well, we need a goal keeper and this is the only one on the radar so far.
Yaya Toure from Barcelona = Fan speculation – on our wish list so why not sell some papers off the back of it?
Roque Santa Cruz from Blackburn = Yeah… only if Ade goes (see below)... and even then – I doubt it.
Hatem Ben Arfa from Lyon = Apparently this is likely, although it’s all gone quiet over there regarding agreeing a fee.
Lilian Thuram from Barcalona = At 36, you’re having a laugh... unless it’s in the run up for a coaching position?
Mauro Zárate from Al-Sadd (On loan to Birmingham) = Overpriced and I doubt that we’ll start taking players on-loan.
David Villa from Valencia = Team speculation (Top of Fabregas' wish list but if he’s coming to the EPL then Abramovich outbid us to the tune of 25 million)
Outbox:
Kolo Toure = Media speculation in order to destabilise the team relationship with Gallas... again!
Emmanuel Adebayor = The Daily Hate Mail stirring it up.
Alexander Hleb = Agent taking the piss – but show us the money... and we’ll consider it.
Matthieu Flamini = Champions League, you’re having a laugh! Have fun being second fiddle to Gattusso and playing FC Shitskivich in the UEFA cup… mug!
Returns:
Carlos Vela = So long Osasuna and thanks for all the fish! Will the wonder boy deliver? Will he get his visa?! Watch out for this lad- he's going to shine.
We should also consider who is going to be stepping up from the reserves next season... it is fair to say that the youth system is maturing now and producing the goods – will we see a select few get their chance to shine in the League and FA Cup? I certainly hope so.
While we are on the subject of rumours The Joker emailed me again with this rather depressing summation of the recent goings on behind closed doors:
“Hi DogFace, With Hill Wood's change of position, it looks set to us to be a straight fight for control between Kroenke and Usmanov. Although the former is marginally preferable from your point of view, both represent selling out to the gambling markets. Good news? Depends on your perspective - it will mean you will be allowed a shot of the title.”
He’s usually right but I hold out hope of the board being able to keep a leash on this hyena. I for one will be livid if he comes into the board room playing the ‘saviour’ and spending money we don’t have i.e. borrowing the funds from one of his mates in the lodge, spending it on overpriced brats and securing the loan on the club as an asset – look at Man-U, 764 million quid in debt and still spending!! I’m quite sure that SAF doesn’t give a fuck as he’s set to retire with a fat cheque and a bronze bust in honour of his ‘genius’ before the bailiffs kick the doors down and raid the stolen goods in the trophy cabinet. Manure fans would have you believe that this spending is some form of ‘generosity’ from Malcom Glazier... no – this is DEBT and a dirty great big global recession is peeking its head just around the corner.
Check out the economics - the cost of living is going up, inflation is going up (therefore interest rates can’t be held down) the twittering, prawn sandwich munching, middle classes who took out the stupid self assessment mortgages on their stupid fucking houses in an attempt to outdo each other are reaping it big time and are going under left right and centre – and remind me... who is it that buys all your season tickets these days?
Warning – your club could be at risk if you fail to keep up repayments on a loan secured against it.
[20/05/2008 10:45:13] DogFace says: Hmmm... http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/7409979.stm Pitch is fucked for tomorrow.
[20/05/2008 10:45:34] DogFace says: Randomising factor #1 in place ;-)
[20/05/2008 10:45:44] dhjackal says: should suit our long ball game then
[20/05/2008 10:45:58] DogFace says: And the 'hoof it at Drogba' game.
[20/05/2008 10:46:08] dhjackal says: yeah
[20/05/2008 10:46:16] dhjackal says: after all we don't play footaball
[20/05/2008 10:46:25] dhjackal says: and only won the league by luck
[20/05/2008 10:46:28] DogFace says: You play better football than chelsea
[20/05/2008 10:46:35] dhjackal says: thanks
[20/05/2008 10:46:39] DogFace says: And it wasn't luck - you cheated!
[20/05/2008 10:46:43] DogFace says: :-D
[20/05/2008 10:46:47] dhjackal says: we won!
[20/05/2008 10:48:11] DogFace says: Ooh - listen to the interview... you boys have got the 'winning dressing room' over 90% of the teams who have that dressing room win... apparently.
[20/05/2008 10:48:26] dhjackal says: that's it then
[20/05/2008 10:48:36] dhjackal says: might as well fuel up the bus
[20/05/2008 10:48:50] DogFace says: My cash is big on Man-u!
[20/05/2008 10:49:12] DogFace says: Or Chelsea... hmmm.
[20/05/2008 10:49:45] DogFace says: Right - OK, shit pitch which means low scoring game - draw in 90 minutes and Man-u to nick it in extra time.
[20/05/2008 10:50:20] DogFace says: HT/FT Manu/Draw – the Chavs to equalise with a dodgy decision.
[20/05/2008 10:50:52] DogFace says: You will have the better fitness though - so if it goes past 90 minutes they'll start cramping up.
[20/05/2008 10:51:41] DogFace says: The chavs will probably want to take it to penalties though - so might be a dull game.
[20/05/2008 10:52:15] dhjackal says: i guess we'll find out tomorrow
[20/05/2008 10:52:27] DogFace says: Yeah man - you got any cash on it?
[20/05/2008 10:52:36] dhjackal says: no
[20/05/2008 10:52:38] DogFace says: What's your read of the game?
[20/05/2008 10:52:46] dhjackal says: we're going to win
[20/05/2008 10:52:50] DogFace says: How?
[20/05/2008 10:52:54] dhjackal says: don't care
[20/05/2008 10:52:57] DogFace says: Ha – fair enough.
[20/05/2008 10:54:26] DogFace says: If it goes to penalties and Ronaldo chokes I hope you don't mind if I take the piss the next day?
[20/05/2008 11:41:30] DogFace says: Good job you're not going – check it out: "Anyone planning on excessive drinking in Moscow, though, has been warned against it.
The city has special 'drink police' who travel around with mobile cells, looking for drunks, and if those cells are full, offenders risk being taken to 'sobering houses'."
[20/05/2008 11:42:43] dhjackal says: what a load of shit
[20/05/2008 11:43:00] DogFace says: You'd be banged up in a mobile cell!
[20/05/2008 11:43:14] dhjackal says: probably
[20/05/2008 11:43:20] DogFace says: or taken to a sobering house - WTF is a sobering house?
[20/05/2008 11:43:21] dhjackal says: they have those in Oz
[20/05/2008 11:43:35] DogFace says: Really? Blimey!
[20/05/2008 11:44:15] DogFace says: Check it out: "Slovakian Lubos Michel will referee the match - the man who officiated the Champions League semi-final between Chelsea and Liverpool in 2005, when Luis Garcia was controversially award the goal that saw the Reds to the final."
[20/05/2008 11:45:14] DogFace says: The ref has form... one wonders who the highest bidder was?
[20/05/2008 11:45:17] DogFace says: (rofl)
[20/05/2008 11:45:17] DogFace says: Hey – wasn’t that the boy who fucked Ghana against Brazil in the 2006 World Cup?
[20/05/2008 11:45:34] dhjackal says: (finger)
Inbox:
Samir Nasri from Marseille = Reassuringly expensive.
Miguel Veloso from Sporting Lisbon = This boy just wants some Premiership action i.e. wages – but feisty and Flaminiesque!
Alberto Aquilani from Roma = His scumbag agent is just trying his luck.
Sebastian Frey from Fiorentina = Well, we need a goal keeper and this is the only one on the radar so far.
Yaya Toure from Barcelona = Fan speculation – on our wish list so why not sell some papers off the back of it?
Roque Santa Cruz from Blackburn = Yeah… only if Ade goes (see below)... and even then – I doubt it.
Hatem Ben Arfa from Lyon = Apparently this is likely, although it’s all gone quiet over there regarding agreeing a fee.
Lilian Thuram from Barcalona = At 36, you’re having a laugh... unless it’s in the run up for a coaching position?
Mauro Zárate from Al-Sadd (On loan to Birmingham) = Overpriced and I doubt that we’ll start taking players on-loan.
David Villa from Valencia = Team speculation (Top of Fabregas' wish list but if he’s coming to the EPL then Abramovich outbid us to the tune of 25 million)
Outbox:
Kolo Toure = Media speculation in order to destabilise the team relationship with Gallas... again!
Emmanuel Adebayor = The Daily Hate Mail stirring it up.
Alexander Hleb = Agent taking the piss – but show us the money... and we’ll consider it.
Matthieu Flamini = Champions League, you’re having a laugh! Have fun being second fiddle to Gattusso and playing FC Shitskivich in the UEFA cup… mug!
Returns:
Carlos Vela = So long Osasuna and thanks for all the fish! Will the wonder boy deliver? Will he get his visa?! Watch out for this lad- he's going to shine.
We should also consider who is going to be stepping up from the reserves next season... it is fair to say that the youth system is maturing now and producing the goods – will we see a select few get their chance to shine in the League and FA Cup? I certainly hope so.
While we are on the subject of rumours The Joker emailed me again with this rather depressing summation of the recent goings on behind closed doors:
“Hi DogFace, With Hill Wood's change of position, it looks set to us to be a straight fight for control between Kroenke and Usmanov. Although the former is marginally preferable from your point of view, both represent selling out to the gambling markets. Good news? Depends on your perspective - it will mean you will be allowed a shot of the title.”
He’s usually right but I hold out hope of the board being able to keep a leash on this hyena. I for one will be livid if he comes into the board room playing the ‘saviour’ and spending money we don’t have i.e. borrowing the funds from one of his mates in the lodge, spending it on overpriced brats and securing the loan on the club as an asset – look at Man-U, 764 million quid in debt and still spending!! I’m quite sure that SAF doesn’t give a fuck as he’s set to retire with a fat cheque and a bronze bust in honour of his ‘genius’ before the bailiffs kick the doors down and raid the stolen goods in the trophy cabinet. Manure fans would have you believe that this spending is some form of ‘generosity’ from Malcom Glazier... no – this is DEBT and a dirty great big global recession is peeking its head just around the corner.
Check out the economics - the cost of living is going up, inflation is going up (therefore interest rates can’t be held down) the twittering, prawn sandwich munching, middle classes who took out the stupid self assessment mortgages on their stupid fucking houses in an attempt to outdo each other are reaping it big time and are going under left right and centre – and remind me... who is it that buys all your season tickets these days?
Warning – your club could be at risk if you fail to keep up repayments on a loan secured against it.
[20/05/2008 10:45:13] DogFace says: Hmmm... http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/7409979.stm
[20/05/2008 10:45:34] DogFace says: Randomising factor #1 in place ;-)
[20/05/2008 10:45:44] dhjackal says: should suit our long ball game then
[20/05/2008 10:45:58] DogFace says: And the 'hoof it at Drogba' game.
[20/05/2008 10:46:08] dhjackal says: yeah
[20/05/2008 10:46:16] dhjackal says: after all we don't play footaball
[20/05/2008 10:46:25] dhjackal says: and only won the league by luck
[20/05/2008 10:46:28] DogFace says: You play better football than chelsea
[20/05/2008 10:46:35] dhjackal says: thanks
[20/05/2008 10:46:39] DogFace says: And it wasn't luck - you cheated!
[20/05/2008 10:46:43] DogFace says: :-D
[20/05/2008 10:46:47] dhjackal says: we won!
[20/05/2008 10:48:11] DogFace says: Ooh - listen to the interview... you boys have got the 'winning dressing room' over 90% of the teams who have that dressing room win... apparently.
[20/05/2008 10:48:26] dhjackal says: that's it then
[20/05/2008 10:48:36] dhjackal says: might as well fuel up the bus
[20/05/2008 10:48:50] DogFace says: My cash is big on Man-u!
[20/05/2008 10:49:12] DogFace says: Or Chelsea... hmmm.
[20/05/2008 10:49:45] DogFace says: Right - OK, shit pitch which means low scoring game - draw in 90 minutes and Man-u to nick it in extra time.
[20/05/2008 10:50:20] DogFace says: HT/FT Manu/Draw – the Chavs to equalise with a dodgy decision.
[20/05/2008 10:50:52] DogFace says: You will have the better fitness though - so if it goes past 90 minutes they'll start cramping up.
[20/05/2008 10:51:41] DogFace says: The chavs will probably want to take it to penalties though - so might be a dull game.
[20/05/2008 10:52:15] dhjackal says: i guess we'll find out tomorrow
[20/05/2008 10:52:27] DogFace says: Yeah man - you got any cash on it?
[20/05/2008 10:52:36] dhjackal says: no
[20/05/2008 10:52:38] DogFace says: What's your read of the game?
[20/05/2008 10:52:46] dhjackal says: we're going to win
[20/05/2008 10:52:50] DogFace says: How?
[20/05/2008 10:52:54] dhjackal says: don't care
[20/05/2008 10:52:57] DogFace says: Ha – fair enough.
[20/05/2008 10:54:26] DogFace says: If it goes to penalties and Ronaldo chokes I hope you don't mind if I take the piss the next day?
[20/05/2008 11:41:30] DogFace says: Good job you're not going – check it out: "Anyone planning on excessive drinking in Moscow, though, has been warned against it.
The city has special 'drink police' who travel around with mobile cells, looking for drunks, and if those cells are full, offenders risk being taken to 'sobering houses'."
[20/05/2008 11:42:43] dhjackal says: what a load of shit
[20/05/2008 11:43:00] DogFace says: You'd be banged up in a mobile cell!
[20/05/2008 11:43:14] dhjackal says: probably
[20/05/2008 11:43:20] DogFace says: or taken to a sobering house - WTF is a sobering house?
[20/05/2008 11:43:21] dhjackal says: they have those in Oz
[20/05/2008 11:43:35] DogFace says: Really? Blimey!
[20/05/2008 11:44:15] DogFace says: Check it out: "Slovakian Lubos Michel will referee the match - the man who officiated the Champions League semi-final between Chelsea and Liverpool in 2005, when Luis Garcia was controversially award the goal that saw the Reds to the final."
[20/05/2008 11:45:14] DogFace says: The ref has form... one wonders who the highest bidder was?
[20/05/2008 11:45:17] DogFace says: (rofl)
[20/05/2008 11:45:17] DogFace says: Hey – wasn’t that the boy who fucked Ghana against Brazil in the 2006 World Cup?
[20/05/2008 11:45:34] dhjackal says: (finger)
Thursday, 15 May 2008
There may be trouble ahead.
Well – what a week it’s been, or turning out to be; Edelmann has been given his marching orders (but we already knew that) – what we didn’t know was why. The press were none the wiser and proceeded to speculate and generally make shit up in order to plump a few column inches. Now, new information comes to light!
The Joker emailed me the other day, totally unexpected as I had assumed that his focus would have been busied away on projects and other such stuff, but true to his word he got back to me and, among other things, he said this:
“BTW, we delayed our contact of ****** following Edelmann's resignation. There is a view that this is a significant development regarding Fat Boy. What do you reckon?”
Now - when The Joker isn’t sure then you know that the board are playing things close to their chest. The Joker has a finger, or at least someone else’s finger, in chicken balti pies (or the vegan equivilant), up and down the land. I replied:
"I would, through my ever rose tinted glasses, hope that Edelmann was caught cosying up to Jabba and Dein (that little goblin creature who dances around Jabba cackling while he eats frogs) and 'let go'. I hope. I don't know. Um. There would have to be a sea-change of attitude in the board to bring in the money - but that's the way money works, it bangs on the door relentless mocking your integrity until it wears down your resolve."
Three minutes later the news broke that a certain Mr. Stan Kroenke was sniffing around a seat on the board. Just what is going on? We have gone from: “We don’t need your money!” to – “We want your protection!”. Money and protection... anyone see a connection?
The ever straight talking Colonel_Decker from the Facebook Intelligentsia group postulated this analogy:
“Arsenal are the gorgeous sexy girl in the nightclub and these two are the men inside with their eyes on her. They are using different tactics, Usmanov is striding up all pissed and confident slapping her arse and buying her mates rounds of Champagne and telling her how fit she is and what he wants to do to her. Where as Kroenke has approached politely offering to buy a cocktail hoping to impress a gentlemanly impression on her. He hopes that by not pushing things too far she will approach him wanting him to 'pretend to be her boyfriend' to protect her from the loaded loud guy who keeps rubbing his 'half a nasty' against her leg. But beware young sexy attractive Lady, ultimately they both just want the same thing, to fuck you.”
Personally – I think that the board are walking a tightrope here... we’re going to get slipped some rhohipnol and spit-roasted in the car park if we’re not careful and for no other provocation than looking sexy as sin in red and white. These men are scum – make no mistake... Let’s hope the ‘Lady in the nightclub’ can cock-tease the two potential suitors into a brawl in which either they both get ejected by the bouncers or realise the pent-up homo eroticism of the situation and jack each other off in the bogs leaving the Lady with nothing left to do but hit the floor and boogie.
Let’s take a moment here to consider the goings on at Eastlands and examine in detail the pitfalls of giving up your arse to the first psychopath that wops it on the table, political realities aside, this is pretty much how it went:
Thaksin buys some flowers for Man City off a gypo at the traffic lights.
Thaksin gets Man City drunk.
Thaksin declares his love for Man City.
Thaksin promises Man City the world.
Thaksin fucks Man City.
Thaksin makes Man City his crack-whore.
Thaksin pimps out Man City to whoever wants it.
Thaksin dumps Man City.
To all you City fans who welcomed this man as your saviour, you reap what you sow. But hey - you're in the Wafer Cup next season for finishing an impressive sixth in the Premier League fair play table (everyone else had already qualified). Soooo... while there’s (blue) moonlight, and music and love and romance...
...let’s face the music and dance!
[15/05/2008 09:25:58] dhjackal says: maybe you are right after all
[15/05/2008 09:26:09] DogFace says: What might I be right about?
[15/05/2008 09:26:15] dhjackal says: match fixing
[15/05/2008 09:26:15] dhjackal says: Avram Grant seems to agree with you
[15/05/2008 09:26:22] DogFace says: Oh Christ - now I know I'm in trouble when he agrees with me!
[15/05/2008 09:26:37] DogFace says: Link me bad boy.
[15/05/2008 09:26:48] dhjackal says: it's in all the papers this morning
[15/05/2008 09:27:01] DogFace says: What's he said?
[15/05/2008 09:27:01] dhjackal says: saying that the ref gave Man Utd the title
[15/05/2008 09:27:19] DogFace says: Ha ha ha - the fucking gall of the cunt!!
[15/05/2008 09:27:31] dhjackal says: that's what i thought
[15/05/2008 09:27:46] DogFace says: I agree with him - but they would be battling with Everton for a CL place if it wasn't for all the match fixing they have done!!!
[15/05/2008 09:27:46] dhjackal says: i hope we win the CL with a dodgy penalty now
[15/05/2008 09:28:05] dhjackal says: some you get some you don't
[15/05/2008 09:28:14] DogFace says: ...right...
[15/05/2008 09:28:31] DogFace says: This is in the run up to the final, obviously it's a ‘pre-emptive spin’.
[15/05/2008 09:29:23] dhjackal says: your right - lump on United
[15/05/2008 09:29:30] DogFace says: Chelsea are probably going to win on dodgy ref decisions and then hold their hands up and say "Hey, it all evens out".
[15/05/2008 09:29:59] DogFace says: Going to check the sports pages now...
[15/05/2008 09:30:08] dhjackal says: (nod)
[15/05/2008 09:30:49] DogFace says: ...nothing on BBC that I can see...
[15/05/2008 09:31:19] DogFace says: Oh hang on... it's hidden away down the headlines.
[15/05/2008 09:31:58] DogFace says: "In England there are some very good referees - but there are some, a few of them, you can influence,"
[15/05/2008 09:32:19] DogFace says: He should know as he's 'influenced' most of them!!!
[15/05/2008 09:35:42] dhjackal says: (smirk)
[15/05/2008 10:09:09] DogFace says: This is very interesting indeed... I wonder what Chelsea are up to - either this is a desperate attempt to curry favour with the CL ref's after they failed to buy them (I doubt it as in a fair game they would lose) or it's an attempt to put the thought that 'Chelsea deserve it' and 'Chelsea don’t cheat' in the public mind to dampen any hoo-haa if there are any dodgy decisions in the favour of the Chavs.
[15/05/2008 10:23:16] dhjackal says: Mmmm
[15/05/2008 10:23:27] dhjackal says: i guess we'll find out on Wednesday
[15/05/2008 10:29:46] DogFace says: I await a Fergie response - he won't be able to help himself!
[15/05/2008 10:31:16] DogFace says: he's probably reading the papers now over his cornflakes - his hands shaking like crazy...
[15/05/2008 10:31:28] dhjackal says: i doubt it
[15/05/2008 10:31:38] DogFace says: ...then he has his triple scotch and the shakes calm down a bit!
[15/05/2008 10:31:55] dhjackal says: he's probably cleaning all the medals in his trophy cabinet - too busy to read the papers
[15/05/2008 10:32:26] DogFace says: I hope he doesn’t do it with his breath and a tissue or they'll melt!
[15/05/2008 14:04:41] dhjackal says: http://soccernet.espn.go.com/news/story?id=535471&cc=5739
[15/05/2008 14:04:59] DogFace says: Yeah, yeah - old news.
[15/05/2008 14:05:06] dhjackal says: raped!
[15/05/2008 14:05:17] dhjackal says: at least it won't be by your own
[15/05/2008 14:05:37] DogFace says: We're pitting one fat pig against the other – although it doesn’t look good.
[15/05/2008 14:05:40] DogFace says: :-(
The Joker emailed me the other day, totally unexpected as I had assumed that his focus would have been busied away on projects and other such stuff, but true to his word he got back to me and, among other things, he said this:
“BTW, we delayed our contact of ****** following Edelmann's resignation. There is a view that this is a significant development regarding Fat Boy. What do you reckon?”
Now - when The Joker isn’t sure then you know that the board are playing things close to their chest. The Joker has a finger, or at least someone else’s finger, in chicken balti pies (or the vegan equivilant), up and down the land. I replied:
"I would, through my ever rose tinted glasses, hope that Edelmann was caught cosying up to Jabba and Dein (that little goblin creature who dances around Jabba cackling while he eats frogs) and 'let go'. I hope. I don't know. Um. There would have to be a sea-change of attitude in the board to bring in the money - but that's the way money works, it bangs on the door relentless mocking your integrity until it wears down your resolve."
Three minutes later the news broke that a certain Mr. Stan Kroenke was sniffing around a seat on the board. Just what is going on? We have gone from: “We don’t need your money!” to – “We want your protection!”. Money and protection... anyone see a connection?
The ever straight talking Colonel_Decker from the Facebook Intelligentsia group postulated this analogy:
“Arsenal are the gorgeous sexy girl in the nightclub and these two are the men inside with their eyes on her. They are using different tactics, Usmanov is striding up all pissed and confident slapping her arse and buying her mates rounds of Champagne and telling her how fit she is and what he wants to do to her. Where as Kroenke has approached politely offering to buy a cocktail hoping to impress a gentlemanly impression on her. He hopes that by not pushing things too far she will approach him wanting him to 'pretend to be her boyfriend' to protect her from the loaded loud guy who keeps rubbing his 'half a nasty' against her leg. But beware young sexy attractive Lady, ultimately they both just want the same thing, to fuck you.”
Personally – I think that the board are walking a tightrope here... we’re going to get slipped some rhohipnol and spit-roasted in the car park if we’re not careful and for no other provocation than looking sexy as sin in red and white. These men are scum – make no mistake... Let’s hope the ‘Lady in the nightclub’ can cock-tease the two potential suitors into a brawl in which either they both get ejected by the bouncers or realise the pent-up homo eroticism of the situation and jack each other off in the bogs leaving the Lady with nothing left to do but hit the floor and boogie.
Let’s take a moment here to consider the goings on at Eastlands and examine in detail the pitfalls of giving up your arse to the first psychopath that wops it on the table, political realities aside, this is pretty much how it went:
Thaksin buys some flowers for Man City off a gypo at the traffic lights.
Thaksin gets Man City drunk.
Thaksin declares his love for Man City.
Thaksin promises Man City the world.
Thaksin fucks Man City.
Thaksin makes Man City his crack-whore.
Thaksin pimps out Man City to whoever wants it.
Thaksin dumps Man City.
To all you City fans who welcomed this man as your saviour, you reap what you sow. But hey - you're in the Wafer Cup next season for finishing an impressive sixth in the Premier League fair play table (everyone else had already qualified). Soooo... while there’s (blue) moonlight, and music and love and romance...
...let’s face the music and dance!
[15/05/2008 09:25:58] dhjackal says: maybe you are right after all
[15/05/2008 09:26:09] DogFace says: What might I be right about?
[15/05/2008 09:26:15] dhjackal says: match fixing
[15/05/2008 09:26:15] dhjackal says: Avram Grant seems to agree with you
[15/05/2008 09:26:22] DogFace says: Oh Christ - now I know I'm in trouble when he agrees with me!
[15/05/2008 09:26:37] DogFace says: Link me bad boy.
[15/05/2008 09:26:48] dhjackal says: it's in all the papers this morning
[15/05/2008 09:27:01] DogFace says: What's he said?
[15/05/2008 09:27:01] dhjackal says: saying that the ref gave Man Utd the title
[15/05/2008 09:27:19] DogFace says: Ha ha ha - the fucking gall of the cunt!!
[15/05/2008 09:27:31] dhjackal says: that's what i thought
[15/05/2008 09:27:46] DogFace says: I agree with him - but they would be battling with Everton for a CL place if it wasn't for all the match fixing they have done!!!
[15/05/2008 09:27:46] dhjackal says: i hope we win the CL with a dodgy penalty now
[15/05/2008 09:28:05] dhjackal says: some you get some you don't
[15/05/2008 09:28:14] DogFace says: ...right...
[15/05/2008 09:28:31] DogFace says: This is in the run up to the final, obviously it's a ‘pre-emptive spin’.
[15/05/2008 09:29:23] dhjackal says: your right - lump on United
[15/05/2008 09:29:30] DogFace says: Chelsea are probably going to win on dodgy ref decisions and then hold their hands up and say "Hey, it all evens out".
[15/05/2008 09:29:59] DogFace says: Going to check the sports pages now...
[15/05/2008 09:30:08] dhjackal says: (nod)
[15/05/2008 09:30:49] DogFace says: ...nothing on BBC that I can see...
[15/05/2008 09:31:19] DogFace says: Oh hang on... it's hidden away down the headlines.
[15/05/2008 09:31:58] DogFace says: "In England there are some very good referees - but there are some, a few of them, you can influence,"
[15/05/2008 09:32:19] DogFace says: He should know as he's 'influenced' most of them!!!
[15/05/2008 09:35:42] dhjackal says: (smirk)
[15/05/2008 10:09:09] DogFace says: This is very interesting indeed... I wonder what Chelsea are up to - either this is a desperate attempt to curry favour with the CL ref's after they failed to buy them (I doubt it as in a fair game they would lose) or it's an attempt to put the thought that 'Chelsea deserve it' and 'Chelsea don’t cheat' in the public mind to dampen any hoo-haa if there are any dodgy decisions in the favour of the Chavs.
[15/05/2008 10:23:16] dhjackal says: Mmmm
[15/05/2008 10:23:27] dhjackal says: i guess we'll find out on Wednesday
[15/05/2008 10:29:46] DogFace says: I await a Fergie response - he won't be able to help himself!
[15/05/2008 10:31:16] DogFace says: he's probably reading the papers now over his cornflakes - his hands shaking like crazy...
[15/05/2008 10:31:28] dhjackal says: i doubt it
[15/05/2008 10:31:38] DogFace says: ...then he has his triple scotch and the shakes calm down a bit!
[15/05/2008 10:31:55] dhjackal says: he's probably cleaning all the medals in his trophy cabinet - too busy to read the papers
[15/05/2008 10:32:26] DogFace says: I hope he doesn’t do it with his breath and a tissue or they'll melt!
[15/05/2008 14:04:41] dhjackal says: http://soccernet.espn.go.com/news/story?id=535471&cc=5739
[15/05/2008 14:04:59] DogFace says: Yeah, yeah - old news.
[15/05/2008 14:05:06] dhjackal says: raped!
[15/05/2008 14:05:17] dhjackal says: at least it won't be by your own
[15/05/2008 14:05:37] DogFace says: We're pitting one fat pig against the other – although it doesn’t look good.
[15/05/2008 14:05:40] DogFace says: :-(
Tuesday, 13 May 2008
So this is Christmas...
The season is now officially over and we are once again without trophies – we did, however, play some proper football!
In years to come I wonder if anyone will remember this and talk about the Arsenal team of 2007-2008 being the best team that ever was not to win anything... will anyone ever know this or will the kids of the future just look at the form book and think we were shit?
No chance – those glorious games where we played total football will be scrunched up cast into the memory hole quicker than the Fett gets sucked into a Sarlacc... (you geek).
And much like Lucas and his disgraceful CGI tentacles; for the sake of ultimate profit, history itself will be retrofitted with the convenient truths of the boys with the cash who are clearly running this dirty little show.
So what do we Gooners have to look forward to this summer?
Hmmm... well – Flamini has gone and Hleb will probably go too... we’ll sign Ben Arfa (apparently) – or some billionaire might just spunk up some more cash and nick him at the last minute. Plus we will get another player with experience from another Premiership side!
*oooh – we wonder who* (seriously – I’ve no idea, not like Wenger at all)
I’m in two minds about Flamini... he clearly knows that, now Berlusconi is back in power, AC Milan will probably do the double – added to that they are offering him a sack of cash to train less, play every other game and not get kicked as much. What would you do? Sign for fucking Arsenal – that’s what I would do... little turd!
Hleb got outrageously tapped up by Inter and his agent is just an odious little cunt of the highest order – although, I do actually understand why Hleb would want to leave. I can’t blame him for not wanting to get kicked in the air all season long with no protection from the ref whatsoever. Thanks to the BBC’s ‘ban Hleb’ campaign masquerading as a match review; that slap on Murty was probably his final comment - well said... if a foreigner slaps an Englishman who deserves a slap the media will hang him. If an Englishman ruins a foreigner because he’s ‘a bit tricky’ then the media will say ‘ooh, what a terrible accident, you must be feeling rotten – have a cup of milky tea Mr. Taylor with two sugars, poor thing’.
Emirates cup here we come!
[12/05/2008 09:25:12] dhjackal says: one word
[12/05/2008 09:25:15] dhjackal says: CHAMPIONS
[12/05/2008 09:49:04] DogFace says: *whatever*
[12/05/2008 14:32:18] dhjackal says: oi
[12/05/2008 14:32:26] DogFace says: Whaddup?
[12/05/2008 14:32:38] dhjackal says: Fulham might be in the Uefa cup next season
[12/05/2008 14:32:45] dhjackal says: through the fair play league
[12/05/2008 14:32:56] DogFace says: Really... I thought city had it in the baggie?
[12/05/2008 14:33:08] dhjackal says: Dunne got sent off y'day
[12/05/2008 14:33:18] DogFace says: Interesting - does that change anything though?
[13/05/2008 11:59:23] DogFace says: Ha - I see expectations of a classic encounter among the fans are running high:
[13/05/2008 11:59:27] DogFace says: http://www.thespoiler.co.uk/index.php/2008/05/13/chelsea-return-5000-champions-league-tickets
[13/05/2008 12:01:25] dhjackal says: ffs
[13/05/2008 12:01:35] dhjackal says: i was still looking at flights this morning
[13/05/2008 12:01:40] dhjackal says: £1000 minimum
[13/05/2008 12:01:52] dhjackal says: and that's without hotel or ticket for the game
[13/05/2008 12:02:07] dhjackal says: it's a fucking joke
[13/05/2008 12:02:18] DogFace says: Sleep rough – it should be nice and warm in Moscow this time of year.
[13/05/2008 12:02:23] dhjackal says: UEFA are a bunch of cunts
[13/05/2008 12:02:44] dhjackal says: to be honest i'm not worried about accommendation
[13/05/2008 12:02:57] dhjackal says: it's the £1000+ for flights and 3 days off work
[13/05/2008 12:03:10] dhjackal says: it'd cost me £2k easy
[13/05/2008 12:03:12] DogFace says: What - so you’re considering going?
[13/05/2008 12:03:17] dhjackal says: course
[13/05/2008 12:04:10] DogFace says: You would pay 2 grand and travel halfway around the world to watch your team get robbed blind by a shit Chelsea side?
[13/05/2008 12:04:27] dhjackal says: or see them win the champions league
[13/05/2008 12:05:04] DogFace says: True... true - that could happen also.
[13/05/2008 12:05:24] dhjackal says: exactly
[13/05/2008 12:05:30] DogFace says: But I doubt it.
[13/05/2008 12:05:42] dhjackal says: you doubt a lot of things
[13/05/2008 12:05:48] DogFace says: Good luck to you though - as Man-u are the better team.
[13/05/2008 12:05:58] dhjackal says: thanks
[13/05/2008 12:06:44] DogFace says: You realise that Roman is going to be spunking cash on this one - no holes barred to gain an advantage... and it's in Moscow - that's what would worry me if I was a manure fan.
[13/05/2008 12:06:57] dhjackal says: it does
[13/05/2008 12:07:06] dhjackal says: but you've just got to get on with it and hope we stick 2 goals in quick time
[13/05/2008 12:07:26] dhjackal says: and don;'t get fucked - if we do we do
[13/05/2008 12:07:36] DogFace says: Backs to the wall big time!
[13/05/2008 12:07:40] DogFace says: He has friends in some very high places over there.
[13/05/2008 12:07:41] dhjackal says: probably
[13/05/2008 12:07:55] dhjackal says: hopefully Vidic will ruin Drogba
[13/05/2008 12:07:55] DogFace says: Start a riot if you get robbed - make some history – reds Vs blues, proper old school!
[13/05/2008 12:08:05] dhjackal says: not over there
[13/05/2008 12:08:12] dhjackal says: tear gas and dogs job
[13/05/2008 12:08:18] DogFace says: Nah - you'll be ok; you’ll be on the vodka!
[13/05/2008 12:08:22] DogFace says: (chuckle)
[13/05/2008 12:08:25] dhjackal says: they'd love it
[13/05/2008 12:08:34] DogFace says: It would be great for the neutral - watching man-u and chav fans getting ripped to shit by dirty great big hounds!
[13/05/2008 12:08:36] dhjackal says: :-O
[13/05/2008 12:08:38] dhjackal says: i'm going to get smashed up in north london
[13/05/2008 12:08:45] dhjackal says: then head over the kings rd
[13/05/2008 12:08:58] dhjackal says: looking for the 5000 cunts who returned their tickets
[13/05/2008 12:18:52] dhjackal says: what you doing for lunch?
[13/05/2008 12:19:49] DogFace says: I’m open to suggestions... need cash.
[13/05/2008 12:20:24] dhjackal says: park to look at girls?
[13/05/2008 12:20:30] DogFace says: Yeah, swing by the sandwich shop first.
In years to come I wonder if anyone will remember this and talk about the Arsenal team of 2007-2008 being the best team that ever was not to win anything... will anyone ever know this or will the kids of the future just look at the form book and think we were shit?
No chance – those glorious games where we played total football will be scrunched up cast into the memory hole quicker than the Fett gets sucked into a Sarlacc... (you geek).
And much like Lucas and his disgraceful CGI tentacles; for the sake of ultimate profit, history itself will be retrofitted with the convenient truths of the boys with the cash who are clearly running this dirty little show.
So what do we Gooners have to look forward to this summer?
Hmmm... well – Flamini has gone and Hleb will probably go too... we’ll sign Ben Arfa (apparently) – or some billionaire might just spunk up some more cash and nick him at the last minute. Plus we will get another player with experience from another Premiership side!
*oooh – we wonder who* (seriously – I’ve no idea, not like Wenger at all)
I’m in two minds about Flamini... he clearly knows that, now Berlusconi is back in power, AC Milan will probably do the double – added to that they are offering him a sack of cash to train less, play every other game and not get kicked as much. What would you do? Sign for fucking Arsenal – that’s what I would do... little turd!
Hleb got outrageously tapped up by Inter and his agent is just an odious little cunt of the highest order – although, I do actually understand why Hleb would want to leave. I can’t blame him for not wanting to get kicked in the air all season long with no protection from the ref whatsoever. Thanks to the BBC’s ‘ban Hleb’ campaign masquerading as a match review; that slap on Murty was probably his final comment - well said... if a foreigner slaps an Englishman who deserves a slap the media will hang him. If an Englishman ruins a foreigner because he’s ‘a bit tricky’ then the media will say ‘ooh, what a terrible accident, you must be feeling rotten – have a cup of milky tea Mr. Taylor with two sugars, poor thing’.
Emirates cup here we come!
[12/05/2008 09:25:12] dhjackal says: one word
[12/05/2008 09:25:15] dhjackal says: CHAMPIONS
[12/05/2008 09:49:04] DogFace says: *whatever*
[12/05/2008 14:32:18] dhjackal says: oi
[12/05/2008 14:32:26] DogFace says: Whaddup?
[12/05/2008 14:32:38] dhjackal says: Fulham might be in the Uefa cup next season
[12/05/2008 14:32:45] dhjackal says: through the fair play league
[12/05/2008 14:32:56] DogFace says: Really... I thought city had it in the baggie?
[12/05/2008 14:33:08] dhjackal says: Dunne got sent off y'day
[12/05/2008 14:33:18] DogFace says: Interesting - does that change anything though?
[13/05/2008 11:59:23] DogFace says: Ha - I see expectations of a classic encounter among the fans are running high:
[13/05/2008 11:59:27] DogFace says: http://www.thespoiler.co.uk/index.php/2008/05/13/chelsea-return-5000-champions-league-tickets
[13/05/2008 12:01:25] dhjackal says: ffs
[13/05/2008 12:01:35] dhjackal says: i was still looking at flights this morning
[13/05/2008 12:01:40] dhjackal says: £1000 minimum
[13/05/2008 12:01:52] dhjackal says: and that's without hotel or ticket for the game
[13/05/2008 12:02:07] dhjackal says: it's a fucking joke
[13/05/2008 12:02:18] DogFace says: Sleep rough – it should be nice and warm in Moscow this time of year.
[13/05/2008 12:02:23] dhjackal says: UEFA are a bunch of cunts
[13/05/2008 12:02:44] dhjackal says: to be honest i'm not worried about accommendation
[13/05/2008 12:02:57] dhjackal says: it's the £1000+ for flights and 3 days off work
[13/05/2008 12:03:10] dhjackal says: it'd cost me £2k easy
[13/05/2008 12:03:12] DogFace says: What - so you’re considering going?
[13/05/2008 12:03:17] dhjackal says: course
[13/05/2008 12:04:10] DogFace says: You would pay 2 grand and travel halfway around the world to watch your team get robbed blind by a shit Chelsea side?
[13/05/2008 12:04:27] dhjackal says: or see them win the champions league
[13/05/2008 12:05:04] DogFace says: True... true - that could happen also.
[13/05/2008 12:05:24] dhjackal says: exactly
[13/05/2008 12:05:30] DogFace says: But I doubt it.
[13/05/2008 12:05:42] dhjackal says: you doubt a lot of things
[13/05/2008 12:05:48] DogFace says: Good luck to you though - as Man-u are the better team.
[13/05/2008 12:05:58] dhjackal says: thanks
[13/05/2008 12:06:44] DogFace says: You realise that Roman is going to be spunking cash on this one - no holes barred to gain an advantage... and it's in Moscow - that's what would worry me if I was a manure fan.
[13/05/2008 12:06:57] dhjackal says: it does
[13/05/2008 12:07:06] dhjackal says: but you've just got to get on with it and hope we stick 2 goals in quick time
[13/05/2008 12:07:26] dhjackal says: and don;'t get fucked - if we do we do
[13/05/2008 12:07:36] DogFace says: Backs to the wall big time!
[13/05/2008 12:07:40] DogFace says: He has friends in some very high places over there.
[13/05/2008 12:07:41] dhjackal says: probably
[13/05/2008 12:07:55] dhjackal says: hopefully Vidic will ruin Drogba
[13/05/2008 12:07:55] DogFace says: Start a riot if you get robbed - make some history – reds Vs blues, proper old school!
[13/05/2008 12:08:05] dhjackal says: not over there
[13/05/2008 12:08:12] dhjackal says: tear gas and dogs job
[13/05/2008 12:08:18] DogFace says: Nah - you'll be ok; you’ll be on the vodka!
[13/05/2008 12:08:22] DogFace says: (chuckle)
[13/05/2008 12:08:25] dhjackal says: they'd love it
[13/05/2008 12:08:34] DogFace says: It would be great for the neutral - watching man-u and chav fans getting ripped to shit by dirty great big hounds!
[13/05/2008 12:08:36] dhjackal says: :-O
[13/05/2008 12:08:38] dhjackal says: i'm going to get smashed up in north london
[13/05/2008 12:08:45] dhjackal says: then head over the kings rd
[13/05/2008 12:08:58] dhjackal says: looking for the 5000 cunts who returned their tickets
[13/05/2008 12:18:52] dhjackal says: what you doing for lunch?
[13/05/2008 12:19:49] DogFace says: I’m open to suggestions... need cash.
[13/05/2008 12:20:24] dhjackal says: park to look at girls?
[13/05/2008 12:20:30] DogFace says: Yeah, swing by the sandwich shop first.
Wednesday, 7 May 2008
Raindrops keep falling on my head
Well, the Everton game wasn’t what I would call ‘total football’ – we beat Everton, but Everton were being nice, they only need 1 point to get into the UEFA cup and they played for the draw with the attitude: “if we get it then we get it otherwise we’ll get it in our last game against Newcastle” – Wenger put out a reserve type squad (to get them ready for next season I imagine) – nobody tried that hard... except Bentner – he tried too hard - but he got the goal, good lad!
I went to the match with PieFace and we met up with the Arsenal Intelligentsia FaceGroup hardcore in the Rocket for beers beforehand. They really are real people, not just computer text sprites as I suspected... thanks guys - we'll do it again next season!
The sun was shining and we sat in the beer garden... we had a laugh and drank strong lager from 4 pint plastic pitchers - the sun was also shining at the match. I got sunstroke. I nearly died. I am a pussy when it comes to sunshine. I should have worn a hat.
That night I lay in a puddle of sweat, my mind felt like a bag of pencils, broken thoughts jolting and clacking off each other, never connecting totally. Claire came up and asked me if I was alright – I didn’t understand her as the language centres had switched off… but at least I had stopped sweating – I said yes.
I had strange hallucinations that night – there was one about football that kept coming and going like the lapping tide of a land locked sea… it was important and very funny in some ways... tragic in others. Wenger was involved as was the stadium – but I can’t quite piece it all together now my mind is back in one piece.
I woke up with horrendous diarrhoea and Claire made me drink water that I didn’t want... I kept drinking and drinking but it never filled me or sloshed in my belly – halfway through the 5th pint I started to sweat again. It felt good.
My 2 y/o daughter, Sophia, came and sat with me and put Claire’s old stethoscope on my chest and listened to my heart beat for hours while Claire went to Hamleys to get a scooter and a penguin for her 3rd birhtday. She stroked my brow while she watched cbeebies and said that daddy was her best friend.
From: DogFace
Sent: 07 May 2008 12:57
To: PieFace
Subject: RE: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
:-D
With regards to your email – not having a ‘rubbish’ team makes it less obvious... but that’s about it – the older players at the bridge are fully aware of what is going on, if not then they have not been very perceptive in their careers.
All I can say is Chelsea have effectively been given a 20 point advantage at the start of the season to reach second place – that’s how good a team they are!
--------------------------------------------------------
From: PieFace
Sent: 07 May 2008 12:05
To: DogFace
Subject: RE: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
I'm suitably impressed - obviously I know that I'm not such a clever c*nt and therefore if I don't insert the asterisk this message won't get through.
--------------------------------------------------------
From: DogFace
Sent: 07 May 2008 11:52
To: PieFace
Subject: RE: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
Basically – your email filter is thick as ѕhit and I’m a clever сunt.
--------------------------------------------------------
From: PieFace
Sent: 07 May 2008 11:49
To: DogFace
Subject: RE: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
How this email got through our email filters with the unedited use of the f word, I do not know!
I'd say that you do need to have a good team and a good manager to begin with, and the cash bribes are the thing that gives you the edge over other similarly or better-talented rivals. If QPR don't improve their team next year, they haven't got a prayer of getting promoted to the Prem, even if all the match officials were paid off with the assistance of billionaire backers - fact. So saying that Chelsea are not a good team, that their players are talentless, and don't deserve to be in the CL final at all, is probably going to put you in the "conspiracy theorist nutter who doesn't know much about football" category.
Plus - it's not the players cheating their way to the titles - it is darker forces at work serving their own selfish interests - you can't give the pawns the credit for winning the chess match ... you can only criticise them if they have clearly decided to 'throw' matches and I haven't seen any evidence of that. Yet.
--------------------------------------------------------
From: DogFace
Sent: 07 May 2008 11:21
To: PieFace
Subject: FW: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
The trouble is that pointing out to a football fan that his or her team is corrupt to the core and cheat their way to titles is likely to arouse some animosity... it’s like trying to convince the pope that there is no god even if you turned up at the Vatican with empirical proof, an alien, the resurrection of Bertrand Russell and a signed letter from god saying ‘I do not exist’. He would still say:
“Nahhh, don’t belive it mate – you’re a nutter... let’s just stick with this ‘Catholicism’ thing – after all, it seems to be working out ok for me, now fuсk off you atheist – you’re going to hell when you die, ha ha ha. Champions! Champions!”
--------------------------------------------------------
From: PieFace
Sent: 07 May 2008 11:00
To: DogFace; Chelsea Brian
Subject: RE: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
Bro - there is nothing wrong with lively debate and I am sure that you relish the chance to expound your views.
*ding ding, seconds out, round one*
;-)
PieFace
--------------------------------------------------------
From: DogFace
Sent: 07 May 2008 10:56
To: PieFace; Chelsea Brian
Subject: RE: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
OK – PieFace, Chelsea Brian - don’t get me started on the football otherwise we will fall out – our opinions are diametrically opposed and I will have no respect whatsoever for whomever wins the CL or the EPL as it all comes down to how much $$$ you have – nothing to do with football whatsoever...
...corruption in football is a subject of great concern to me and one that I feel very strongly about – I’m sure that you have been exposed to my mothers streak of ‘stubborn determination’ combined with ‘utter conviction’ when if came to matters or causes that she adopted (and, above all, knew she was right about) – well I have inherited that streak from her so you will know what to expect if you try and convince me otherwise, label or belittle my views.
So stop stirring it up PieFace!
:-)
--------------------------------------------------------
From: PieFace
Sent: 07 May 2008 10:23
To: Chelsea Brian; DogFace
Subject: RE: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
Chelsea Brian - no doubt we will have a good chance to mull over the season and DogFace can dazzle you with his well-informed conspiracy theories when we see you! You can't say that Grant hasn't done a good job, even if he did promise champagne football and when that didn't work, quite sensible reverted to the effective winning football style that Mourinho integrated. You can't get as close as he has done to the Prem and CL titles without being a good manager. The fans should pay him respect where it is due.
PieFace
--------------------------------------------------------
From: Chelsea Brian
Sent: 06 May 2008 21:13
To: PieFace; DogFace
Subject: Re: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
Hi lads
I can make and am really looking forward to meeting up on these days; I really enjoyed my pre-season visit to the Emirates last year and the fixtures for Day 2 this year promise to be just as entertaining. Thanks so very much fro including me in this.
Well - down to the wire on the Premiership - though I think for about the last 2 weeks most punters [Chelsea anyway] have been expecting it to finish level points with Man U edging it on goal difference. Fair Play to them - their football has been better overall than ours - although I do note that they have been beaten by more teams than we have and if the title is about supremacy over the competition...? Too old/jaded/parsimonious to go to Moscow for the Euro Final, although I think one of my sons is going. As a one-off I think we could well take that - particularly as I think for quite a few Chelsea players (Drogba, Lampard included) it will be their swansong and they will be up for it. Can't make out Grant - he looks so uninspiring and has made so many bad tactical/substitution changes, but I think he is improving and is starting to have the guts to for a result (pity he didn't do it with the Wigan and Tottenham league games - we could have been walking away with the title now). Still think it's the players leading though, which is never good, but then you look at the line-up and it's not really a surprise.
Look forward to seeing you soon.
Chelsea Brian
I went to the match with PieFace and we met up with the Arsenal Intelligentsia FaceGroup hardcore in the Rocket for beers beforehand. They really are real people, not just computer text sprites as I suspected... thanks guys - we'll do it again next season!
The sun was shining and we sat in the beer garden... we had a laugh and drank strong lager from 4 pint plastic pitchers - the sun was also shining at the match. I got sunstroke. I nearly died. I am a pussy when it comes to sunshine. I should have worn a hat.
That night I lay in a puddle of sweat, my mind felt like a bag of pencils, broken thoughts jolting and clacking off each other, never connecting totally. Claire came up and asked me if I was alright – I didn’t understand her as the language centres had switched off… but at least I had stopped sweating – I said yes.
I had strange hallucinations that night – there was one about football that kept coming and going like the lapping tide of a land locked sea… it was important and very funny in some ways... tragic in others. Wenger was involved as was the stadium – but I can’t quite piece it all together now my mind is back in one piece.
I woke up with horrendous diarrhoea and Claire made me drink water that I didn’t want... I kept drinking and drinking but it never filled me or sloshed in my belly – halfway through the 5th pint I started to sweat again. It felt good.
My 2 y/o daughter, Sophia, came and sat with me and put Claire’s old stethoscope on my chest and listened to my heart beat for hours while Claire went to Hamleys to get a scooter and a penguin for her 3rd birhtday. She stroked my brow while she watched cbeebies and said that daddy was her best friend.
From: DogFace
Sent: 07 May 2008 12:57
To: PieFace
Subject: RE: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
:-D
With regards to your email – not having a ‘rubbish’ team makes it less obvious... but that’s about it – the older players at the bridge are fully aware of what is going on, if not then they have not been very perceptive in their careers.
All I can say is Chelsea have effectively been given a 20 point advantage at the start of the season to reach second place – that’s how good a team they are!
--------------------------------------------------------
From: PieFace
Sent: 07 May 2008 12:05
To: DogFace
Subject: RE: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
I'm suitably impressed - obviously I know that I'm not such a clever c*nt and therefore if I don't insert the asterisk this message won't get through.
--------------------------------------------------------
From: DogFace
Sent: 07 May 2008 11:52
To: PieFace
Subject: RE: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
Basically – your email filter is thick as ѕhit and I’m a clever сunt.
--------------------------------------------------------
From: PieFace
Sent: 07 May 2008 11:49
To: DogFace
Subject: RE: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
How this email got through our email filters with the unedited use of the f word, I do not know!
I'd say that you do need to have a good team and a good manager to begin with, and the cash bribes are the thing that gives you the edge over other similarly or better-talented rivals. If QPR don't improve their team next year, they haven't got a prayer of getting promoted to the Prem, even if all the match officials were paid off with the assistance of billionaire backers - fact. So saying that Chelsea are not a good team, that their players are talentless, and don't deserve to be in the CL final at all, is probably going to put you in the "conspiracy theorist nutter who doesn't know much about football" category.
Plus - it's not the players cheating their way to the titles - it is darker forces at work serving their own selfish interests - you can't give the pawns the credit for winning the chess match ... you can only criticise them if they have clearly decided to 'throw' matches and I haven't seen any evidence of that. Yet.
--------------------------------------------------------
From: DogFace
Sent: 07 May 2008 11:21
To: PieFace
Subject: FW: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
The trouble is that pointing out to a football fan that his or her team is corrupt to the core and cheat their way to titles is likely to arouse some animosity... it’s like trying to convince the pope that there is no god even if you turned up at the Vatican with empirical proof, an alien, the resurrection of Bertrand Russell and a signed letter from god saying ‘I do not exist’. He would still say:
“Nahhh, don’t belive it mate – you’re a nutter... let’s just stick with this ‘Catholicism’ thing – after all, it seems to be working out ok for me, now fuсk off you atheist – you’re going to hell when you die, ha ha ha. Champions! Champions!”
--------------------------------------------------------
From: PieFace
Sent: 07 May 2008 11:00
To: DogFace; Chelsea Brian
Subject: RE: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
Bro - there is nothing wrong with lively debate and I am sure that you relish the chance to expound your views.
*ding ding, seconds out, round one*
;-)
PieFace
--------------------------------------------------------
From: DogFace
Sent: 07 May 2008 10:56
To: PieFace; Chelsea Brian
Subject: RE: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
OK – PieFace, Chelsea Brian - don’t get me started on the football otherwise we will fall out – our opinions are diametrically opposed and I will have no respect whatsoever for whomever wins the CL or the EPL as it all comes down to how much $$$ you have – nothing to do with football whatsoever...
...corruption in football is a subject of great concern to me and one that I feel very strongly about – I’m sure that you have been exposed to my mothers streak of ‘stubborn determination’ combined with ‘utter conviction’ when if came to matters or causes that she adopted (and, above all, knew she was right about) – well I have inherited that streak from her so you will know what to expect if you try and convince me otherwise, label or belittle my views.
So stop stirring it up PieFace!
:-)
--------------------------------------------------------
From: PieFace
Sent: 07 May 2008 10:23
To: Chelsea Brian; DogFace
Subject: RE: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
Chelsea Brian - no doubt we will have a good chance to mull over the season and DogFace can dazzle you with his well-informed conspiracy theories when we see you! You can't say that Grant hasn't done a good job, even if he did promise champagne football and when that didn't work, quite sensible reverted to the effective winning football style that Mourinho integrated. You can't get as close as he has done to the Prem and CL titles without being a good manager. The fans should pay him respect where it is due.
PieFace
--------------------------------------------------------
From: Chelsea Brian
Sent: 06 May 2008 21:13
To: PieFace; DogFace
Subject: Re: Emirates Cup - Booking Confirmation
Hi lads
I can make and am really looking forward to meeting up on these days; I really enjoyed my pre-season visit to the Emirates last year and the fixtures for Day 2 this year promise to be just as entertaining. Thanks so very much fro including me in this.
Well - down to the wire on the Premiership - though I think for about the last 2 weeks most punters [Chelsea anyway] have been expecting it to finish level points with Man U edging it on goal difference. Fair Play to them - their football has been better overall than ours - although I do note that they have been beaten by more teams than we have and if the title is about supremacy over the competition...? Too old/jaded/parsimonious to go to Moscow for the Euro Final, although I think one of my sons is going. As a one-off I think we could well take that - particularly as I think for quite a few Chelsea players (Drogba, Lampard included) it will be their swansong and they will be up for it. Can't make out Grant - he looks so uninspiring and has made so many bad tactical/substitution changes, but I think he is improving and is starting to have the guts to for a result (pity he didn't do it with the Wigan and Tottenham league games - we could have been walking away with the title now). Still think it's the players leading though, which is never good, but then you look at the line-up and it's not really a surprise.
Look forward to seeing you soon.
Chelsea Brian
Thursday, 1 May 2008
Your famous blue raincoat..
I want Chelsea to win the champions league 2008 for Lampard’s mum... well – his mum and a huge bribe... well - a series of huge bribes... and threats of physical violence...
...a series of huge bribes, threats of physical violence to friends and family of those concerned and the negatives of them cheating on their wives with an amazingly attractive $1000 p/h prostitute that was hired to meet them in a bar a pretend to really fancy them and shag them in a pre-arranged hotel room with a camera – that and incentives of promotion against threats of refereeing in the Siberian snow-ploughers league... the Man-u dressing room full of skin irritant, the water bottles full of dog-piss and all those guys up in the stands with the sniper scopes and Russian military grade phased television-invisible eye dazzle strobe pulse lasers – oh all that and a nice big plateful of Polonium prawn sandwiches...
...But most of all I want them to win it for Lampard’s mum – it brings a tear to my eye, football is such a pure sport these days, and so in touch with our basic humanity.
:'-\
...That and I really want to piss off dhjackal...
[01/05/2008 14:13:04] dhjackal says: http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/teams/m/man_utd/7377058.stm
[01/05/2008 14:16:13] DogFace says: blimey - Arsenal are 3rd rated most valuable club!!
[01/05/2008 14:16:21] dhjackal says: i know
[01/05/2008 14:17:01] DogFace says: I didn't think we would make the top 10
[01/05/2008 14:17:19] DogFace says: Chelsea in eighth
[01/05/2008 14:17:21] DogFace says: ha
[01/05/2008 14:17:27] DogFace says: shit club
[01/05/2008 14:17:38] dhjackal says: well since you've been screwing your fans out of every penny they have it's no wonder your in the top 3
[01/05/2008 14:17:53] DogFace says: Actually - we represent the best value for money...
[01/05/2008 14:18:10] DogFace says: ...for instance - you can actually watch a proper game of football at Arsenal.
[01/05/2008 14:18:20] dhjackal says: only if your playing United
[01/05/2008 14:18:34] DogFace says: Where as all your fans have to spend an extra £50 on petrol to get to every match.
[01/05/2008 14:19:22] DogFace says: So not only do we play proper football, we are cheaper and more environmentally friendly.
[01/05/2008 14:19:44] dhjackal says: but we get to watch the Champions
[01/05/2008 14:19:52] dhjackal says: oh and current CL finalists
[01/05/2008 14:19:59] DogFace says: We're not owned by American psychopaths who really DO want to screw the fans for every penny.
[01/05/2008 14:20:14] dhjackal says: worse your own are screwing you
[01/05/2008 14:20:20] dhjackal says: your own!
[01/05/2008 14:20:20] DogFace says: Yeah, yeah... it's all business for you.
[01/05/2008 14:20:36] DogFace says: i.e. you give us money we buy you ‘trophies’
[01/05/2008 14:20:44] DogFace says: mugs!
[01/05/2008 14:20:59] dhjackal says: you give us money we win trophies
[01/05/2008 14:21:03] dhjackal says: numpty
[01/05/2008 14:21:12] DogFace says: Do you want to watch football or buy trophies?
[01/05/2008 14:21:18] dhjackal says: lucky you got that PS3
[01/05/2008 14:21:22] DogFace says: Because that's your choice...
[01/05/2008 14:21:28] dhjackal says: esp as your season is over too.
[01/05/2008 14:22:04] DogFace says: ...watch pure football as it's meant to be i.e. honest and true to the game - or pay to watch the script in the ‘theatre of dreams’ – very apt.
[01/05/2008 14:22:26] DogFace says: Might I remind you that you have won nothing yet.
[01/05/2008 14:22:32] dhjackal says: you sound like Wenger
[01/05/2008 14:22:34] dhjackal says: bitter
[01/05/2008 14:23:04] DogFace says: It's wallets at dawn for Abramovic and Glazer...
[01/05/2008 14:23:54] DogFace says: ...like 2 fat pigs wrestling in their own shit - that's what the beautiful game has become for you.
[01/05/2008 14:26:20] dhjackal says: your 3rd richest in the world
[01/05/2008 14:26:29] DogFace says: We earned it.
[01/05/2008 14:26:35] dhjackal says: only difference is our owners give us something back
[01/05/2008 14:26:43] dhjackal says: in the form of transfer money
[01/05/2008 14:26:44] DogFace says: You are high on crack!
[01/05/2008 14:26:46] dhjackal says: to buy players
[01/05/2008 14:26:54] dhjackal says: you get NOTHING back
[01/05/2008 14:26:55] dhjackal says: N
[01/05/2008 14:26:56] dhjackal says: O
[01/05/2008 14:26:57] dhjackal says: T
[01/05/2008 14:26:58] dhjackal says: H
[01/05/2008 14:26:59] dhjackal says: I
[01/05/2008 14:27:00] dhjackal says: N
[01/05/2008 14:27:01] dhjackal says: G
[01/05/2008 14:27:15] DogFace says: Mate - you are selling the family jewels for short term profit...
[01/05/2008 14:27:40] dhjackal says: :^)
[01/05/2008 14:27:42] DogFace says: ...you are selling the family silver for a bag of cocaine then having a wild party with your mates to snort it all away...
[01/05/2008 14:27:49] DogFace says: ...what happens in the morning?
[01/05/2008 14:27:56] dhjackal says: short term
[01/05/2008 14:27:58] DogFace says: You're fucked!
[01/05/2008 14:28:04] dhjackal says: last season we won the league
[01/05/2008 14:28:23] dhjackal says: this season we've challenged on all fronts
[01/05/2008 14:28:31] DogFace says: You are a capitalist commodity.
[01/05/2008 14:28:32] dhjackal says: improvement
[01/05/2008 14:28:41] dhjackal says: and your a fool
[01/05/2008 14:28:45] dhjackal says: (rofl)
[01/05/2008 14:29:00] DogFace says: You will be used to make a few men more money than they can spend.
[01/05/2008 14:29:11] DogFace says: And then you will be dropped.
[01/05/2008 14:29:21] DogFace says: You are the fool and you know it.
[01/05/2008 14:29:41] dhjackal says: (shake)
[01/05/2008 14:29:55] DogFace says: If you think the Glazers want to 'gift' your club money for the fans you are clearly a fucking idiot. :-D
[01/05/2008 14:30:06] dhjackal says: your getting fucked by your own
[01/05/2008 14:30:07] DogFace says: Hang on - are you smoking crack right now, at your desk?
[01/05/2008 14:30:22] dhjackal says: fucked over
[01/05/2008 14:30:27] dhjackal says: arsenal on arsenal
[01/05/2008 14:30:31] DogFace says: We have integrity.
[01/05/2008 14:30:38] DogFace says: We pay for football - we get exactly what it says in the tin.
[01/05/2008 14:31:04] DogFace says: Season tickets at your club are 'loss leaders'.
[01/05/2008 14:31:15] DogFace says: Like a loaf of white-sliced...
[01/05/2008 14:31:28] DogFace says: ...which just about sums up your football:
[01/05/2008 14:31:30] DogFace says: Popular but shit.
[01/05/2008 14:31:35] dhjackal says: 40% corporate
[01/05/2008 14:31:37] dhjackal says: fans???
[01/05/2008 14:31:40] DogFace says: 40%?????
[01/05/2008 14:31:54] DogFace says: Back up your sources please.
[01/05/2008 14:31:54] dhjackal says: they're only there for free grub and beer
[01/05/2008 14:32:09] DogFace says: Ha – this coming from a London/Irish/Celtic ‘manc’ - your ‘fans’ are only there for the prawn sarnies; Man-u is the biggest collection of glory hunters there is - so don't start that shit.
[01/05/2008 14:33:09] dhjackal says: whatever
[01/05/2008 14:33:11] dhjackal says: CHAMPIONS
[01/05/2008 14:33:23] DogFace says: Like that means anything mate?
[01/05/2008 14:33:31] DogFace says: Tell someone who cares.
[01/05/2008 14:33:40] DogFace says: Your gloating rights are null and void.
[01/05/2008 14:33:44] dhjackal says: bitter and twisted
[01/05/2008 14:33:45] dhjackal says: like a City fan
[01/05/2008 14:33:46] DogFace says: So what do you have left??
[01/05/2008 14:33:47] DogFace says: N
[01/05/2008 14:33:51] DogFace says: O
[01/05/2008 14:33:52] DogFace says: T
[01/05/2008 14:33:53] DogFace says: H
[01/05/2008 14:33:54] DogFace says: I
[01/05/2008 14:33:55] DogFace says: N
[01/05/2008 14:33:56] DogFace says: G
[01/05/2008 14:33:57] DogFace says: !
[01/05/2008 14:34:25] dhjackal says: http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/teams/a/arsenal/7377052.stm
[01/05/2008 14:34:26] dhjackal says: Rats
[01/05/2008 14:34:31] dhjackal says: and sinking
[01/05/2008 14:34:34] dhjackal says: ship
[01/05/2008 14:34:56] DogFace says: oh right... first we are 3rd most valuable - and now we are a sinking ship?
...a series of huge bribes, threats of physical violence to friends and family of those concerned and the negatives of them cheating on their wives with an amazingly attractive $1000 p/h prostitute that was hired to meet them in a bar a pretend to really fancy them and shag them in a pre-arranged hotel room with a camera – that and incentives of promotion against threats of refereeing in the Siberian snow-ploughers league... the Man-u dressing room full of skin irritant, the water bottles full of dog-piss and all those guys up in the stands with the sniper scopes and Russian military grade phased television-invisible eye dazzle strobe pulse lasers – oh all that and a nice big plateful of Polonium prawn sandwiches...
...But most of all I want them to win it for Lampard’s mum – it brings a tear to my eye, football is such a pure sport these days, and so in touch with our basic humanity.
:'-\
...That and I really want to piss off dhjackal...
[01/05/2008 14:13:04] dhjackal says: http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/teams/m/man_utd/7377058.stm
[01/05/2008 14:16:13] DogFace says: blimey - Arsenal are 3rd rated most valuable club!!
[01/05/2008 14:16:21] dhjackal says: i know
[01/05/2008 14:17:01] DogFace says: I didn't think we would make the top 10
[01/05/2008 14:17:19] DogFace says: Chelsea in eighth
[01/05/2008 14:17:21] DogFace says: ha
[01/05/2008 14:17:27] DogFace says: shit club
[01/05/2008 14:17:38] dhjackal says: well since you've been screwing your fans out of every penny they have it's no wonder your in the top 3
[01/05/2008 14:17:53] DogFace says: Actually - we represent the best value for money...
[01/05/2008 14:18:10] DogFace says: ...for instance - you can actually watch a proper game of football at Arsenal.
[01/05/2008 14:18:20] dhjackal says: only if your playing United
[01/05/2008 14:18:34] DogFace says: Where as all your fans have to spend an extra £50 on petrol to get to every match.
[01/05/2008 14:19:22] DogFace says: So not only do we play proper football, we are cheaper and more environmentally friendly.
[01/05/2008 14:19:44] dhjackal says: but we get to watch the Champions
[01/05/2008 14:19:52] dhjackal says: oh and current CL finalists
[01/05/2008 14:19:59] DogFace says: We're not owned by American psychopaths who really DO want to screw the fans for every penny.
[01/05/2008 14:20:14] dhjackal says: worse your own are screwing you
[01/05/2008 14:20:20] dhjackal says: your own!
[01/05/2008 14:20:20] DogFace says: Yeah, yeah... it's all business for you.
[01/05/2008 14:20:36] DogFace says: i.e. you give us money we buy you ‘trophies’
[01/05/2008 14:20:44] DogFace says: mugs!
[01/05/2008 14:20:59] dhjackal says: you give us money we win trophies
[01/05/2008 14:21:03] dhjackal says: numpty
[01/05/2008 14:21:12] DogFace says: Do you want to watch football or buy trophies?
[01/05/2008 14:21:18] dhjackal says: lucky you got that PS3
[01/05/2008 14:21:22] DogFace says: Because that's your choice...
[01/05/2008 14:21:28] dhjackal says: esp as your season is over too.
[01/05/2008 14:22:04] DogFace says: ...watch pure football as it's meant to be i.e. honest and true to the game - or pay to watch the script in the ‘theatre of dreams’ – very apt.
[01/05/2008 14:22:26] DogFace says: Might I remind you that you have won nothing yet.
[01/05/2008 14:22:32] dhjackal says: you sound like Wenger
[01/05/2008 14:22:34] dhjackal says: bitter
[01/05/2008 14:23:04] DogFace says: It's wallets at dawn for Abramovic and Glazer...
[01/05/2008 14:23:54] DogFace says: ...like 2 fat pigs wrestling in their own shit - that's what the beautiful game has become for you.
[01/05/2008 14:26:20] dhjackal says: your 3rd richest in the world
[01/05/2008 14:26:29] DogFace says: We earned it.
[01/05/2008 14:26:35] dhjackal says: only difference is our owners give us something back
[01/05/2008 14:26:43] dhjackal says: in the form of transfer money
[01/05/2008 14:26:44] DogFace says: You are high on crack!
[01/05/2008 14:26:46] dhjackal says: to buy players
[01/05/2008 14:26:54] dhjackal says: you get NOTHING back
[01/05/2008 14:26:55] dhjackal says: N
[01/05/2008 14:26:56] dhjackal says: O
[01/05/2008 14:26:57] dhjackal says: T
[01/05/2008 14:26:58] dhjackal says: H
[01/05/2008 14:26:59] dhjackal says: I
[01/05/2008 14:27:00] dhjackal says: N
[01/05/2008 14:27:01] dhjackal says: G
[01/05/2008 14:27:15] DogFace says: Mate - you are selling the family jewels for short term profit...
[01/05/2008 14:27:40] dhjackal says: :^)
[01/05/2008 14:27:42] DogFace says: ...you are selling the family silver for a bag of cocaine then having a wild party with your mates to snort it all away...
[01/05/2008 14:27:49] DogFace says: ...what happens in the morning?
[01/05/2008 14:27:56] dhjackal says: short term
[01/05/2008 14:27:58] DogFace says: You're fucked!
[01/05/2008 14:28:04] dhjackal says: last season we won the league
[01/05/2008 14:28:23] dhjackal says: this season we've challenged on all fronts
[01/05/2008 14:28:31] DogFace says: You are a capitalist commodity.
[01/05/2008 14:28:32] dhjackal says: improvement
[01/05/2008 14:28:41] dhjackal says: and your a fool
[01/05/2008 14:28:45] dhjackal says: (rofl)
[01/05/2008 14:29:00] DogFace says: You will be used to make a few men more money than they can spend.
[01/05/2008 14:29:11] DogFace says: And then you will be dropped.
[01/05/2008 14:29:21] DogFace says: You are the fool and you know it.
[01/05/2008 14:29:41] dhjackal says: (shake)
[01/05/2008 14:29:55] DogFace says: If you think the Glazers want to 'gift' your club money for the fans you are clearly a fucking idiot. :-D
[01/05/2008 14:30:06] dhjackal says: your getting fucked by your own
[01/05/2008 14:30:07] DogFace says: Hang on - are you smoking crack right now, at your desk?
[01/05/2008 14:30:22] dhjackal says: fucked over
[01/05/2008 14:30:27] dhjackal says: arsenal on arsenal
[01/05/2008 14:30:31] DogFace says: We have integrity.
[01/05/2008 14:30:38] DogFace says: We pay for football - we get exactly what it says in the tin.
[01/05/2008 14:31:04] DogFace says: Season tickets at your club are 'loss leaders'.
[01/05/2008 14:31:15] DogFace says: Like a loaf of white-sliced...
[01/05/2008 14:31:28] DogFace says: ...which just about sums up your football:
[01/05/2008 14:31:30] DogFace says: Popular but shit.
[01/05/2008 14:31:35] dhjackal says: 40% corporate
[01/05/2008 14:31:37] dhjackal says: fans???
[01/05/2008 14:31:40] DogFace says: 40%?????
[01/05/2008 14:31:54] DogFace says: Back up your sources please.
[01/05/2008 14:31:54] dhjackal says: they're only there for free grub and beer
[01/05/2008 14:32:09] DogFace says: Ha – this coming from a London/Irish/Celtic ‘manc’ - your ‘fans’ are only there for the prawn sarnies; Man-u is the biggest collection of glory hunters there is - so don't start that shit.
[01/05/2008 14:33:09] dhjackal says: whatever
[01/05/2008 14:33:11] dhjackal says: CHAMPIONS
[01/05/2008 14:33:23] DogFace says: Like that means anything mate?
[01/05/2008 14:33:31] DogFace says: Tell someone who cares.
[01/05/2008 14:33:40] DogFace says: Your gloating rights are null and void.
[01/05/2008 14:33:44] dhjackal says: bitter and twisted
[01/05/2008 14:33:45] dhjackal says: like a City fan
[01/05/2008 14:33:46] DogFace says: So what do you have left??
[01/05/2008 14:33:47] DogFace says: N
[01/05/2008 14:33:51] DogFace says: O
[01/05/2008 14:33:52] DogFace says: T
[01/05/2008 14:33:53] DogFace says: H
[01/05/2008 14:33:54] DogFace says: I
[01/05/2008 14:33:55] DogFace says: N
[01/05/2008 14:33:56] DogFace says: G
[01/05/2008 14:33:57] DogFace says: !
[01/05/2008 14:34:25] dhjackal says: http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/teams/a/arsenal/7377052.stm
[01/05/2008 14:34:26] dhjackal says: Rats
[01/05/2008 14:34:31] dhjackal says: and sinking
[01/05/2008 14:34:34] dhjackal says: ship
[01/05/2008 14:34:56] DogFace says: oh right... first we are 3rd most valuable - and now we are a sinking ship?
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