This weekend is the long awaited (for me) Emirates cup!
Great; finally – after what seems like years in the wilderness - I once again have a matchday to look forward too.I'm going on day 2 to watch the Arsenal play Real Madrid – should be fun... rumour has it that Eduardo will be there to watch, but I'm hoping that he'll come on for a bit of a jog around at some point. He's going to get one hell of a reception if he does and it might one of those moments that'll keep his game on track.
For those that don't know the song for Sat/Sun is thus (to the tune of: "The animals went in two by two"):
He came to us when Henry went,
Eddie! Eddie!
And scored more goals than Darren Bent,
Eddie! Eddie!
He broke his leg but he'll be back,
And Darren Bent will still be cack.
Eduardo Da Silva,
Eddie! Eddie!
And scored more goals than Darren Bent,
Eddie! Eddie!
He broke his leg but he'll be back,
And Darren Bent will still be cack.
Eduardo Da Silva,
Arsenal's number nine!
Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na.
NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA!
They'll fix his leg and he'll be fine,
He'll get the ball and score each time.
NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA!
They'll fix his leg and he'll be fine,
He'll get the ball and score each time.
EDUARDO DA SILVA, ARSENALS NUMBER NINE!!!
Goose bumps coming up already!
For those that only watch on TV – you don't know what you are missing – it's a ritual, it's addictive and it's pure adrenaline... and you don't have to listen to the commentators or suffer having the crowd noise turned down whenever the anti-referee chants chime in... not that there will be any of that this w/e anyway... there was a game last season where the whole crowd sang in unison "The Referee's a Wanker!" followed by "How much did they pay you?" – it was proper loud and clear, this happened at a few games... but this time, in particular, had everyone singing their hearts out with a venom and passion that I have never heard before... I think it was the Middlesbrough game – at the end of the game the officials were booed and jeered off the field – the gang of three stuck close together as they went into the tunnel as an 'un-initiated' camera man leapt out and got right in their pasty faces with a majassive steadycamed up HD TV camera.
On Match Of The Day that night all of this was missing... erased. I was really looking forward to seeing the look on their faces and hearing about the 'shocking display' (insert Scottish accent) 'of refereeing'... but - alas the chants were also turned down and 'remixed' so they were illegible under the commentators voice assuring the viewer that that was, indeed, a fair challenge and the referee had, despite what you saw, got it 'right'.
I reckon you could slap, spit on or at least 'egg' a commentator and/or referee in the street in broad daylight and get away with it as, if he took you to court for assault, you could claim that he was an 'unreliable witness' and have the case thrown out – use the video clips of games he has commentated/officiated on as the basis for this defence:
"M'lud, if I may – it's plain to see from the footage that he don't know his arse from his elbow... init?"
Although you would have to make sure you do it outside the 'courdon sanitaire' to avoid the CCTV cameras; which seem to be used to gather possibly incriminating evidence about the masses from just about everywhere in this country where the filthy rich rub shoulders with the dirty poor...
...Hey – here's a wacky idea – why not get some of those cameras and use them, with the help of an independent and regulated third party, to assist the match officials with their decision making on the field of play?! Genius - I'm going to take that shit to 'dragons den' and make my millions!
Sunday is also Sophia's first game – she's just turned 3 now and I thought it was about time; and what better game for your first game than Arsenal Vs Real Madrid?
That'll silence anyone who calls her a glory hunter in years to come and snipes the question "what was your first match then eh?".
"Actually I was 3 and it was the 2008 pre-season game betwixt Arsenal and Real Mardid... so fuck off cunty." – Sophia (circa 2028).
Sophia also has a pet goldfish that she has called Eduardo... and some of these tiny minnow things called Fabregas, Flamini, Adebayor, Walcott, Gallas and Wenger. I'm kind of hoping that Eduardo might eat Flamini at some point as Sophia refuses to change his name to Nasri.
*Arsenal News*
Talking of Flamini and him not playing in the Champions League, today we find out who we'll be smashing to smithereens in the qualifiers. The un-seeded teams are thus:
Atletico Madrid
Sheriff Tiraspol or Sparta Prague
Drogheda or Dynamo Kiev
Levski Sofia (unlucky Berlusconi)
Slavia Prague
Galatasaray
Inter Baku or Partizan Belgrade
Victoria Guimaraes
Domzale or Dinamo Zagreb
Beitar Jerusalem or Wisla Krakow
Standard Liege
Twente Enschede
Tampere or Artmedia Bratislava
Aalborg or Modrica
Brann or Ventspils
Anorthosis Famagusta or Rapid Vienna
I don't know about you but I quite fancy Beitar Jerusalem myself... whoever they are – I'm showing my ignorance here – but I haven't heard of quite a few of those teams. Still – I bet we end up with one of the following: Atletico Madrid, Sparta Prague, Dynamo Kiev, Dinamo Zagreb, Slavia Prague or Galatasaray.
It should, at least, make for a half decent match if nothing else.
Roll on the weekend!
